Some people think that it is the responsibility of governments to take care of the environment, while others believe that it is the responsibility of the citizens. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Protecting our living habitat has become an important topic in the
twenty first
Add a hyphen
twenty-first
show examples
century. Many believe that it is
government's
Correct article usage
the government's
show examples
duty to safeguard the
environment
,
while
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
others believe that it should be done by the individuals. I believe that safeguarding should be equally shared by both parties. Those who believe
governments
should take responsibility
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
protecting the
environment
argues
Correct subject-verb agreement
argue
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that individuals do not have the resources and power to take action.
In other words
, there have been many cases throughout the world where multinational organisations purposefully
releasing
Wrong verb form
release
show examples
chemical waste to local waterways breaking the
law
. It is obvious in these sorts of situations an individual or a group may not have the resources to prove or even
power
Correct article usage
the power
show examples
to prosecute large companies.
Therefore
, in these instances, the
government
has the total authority
conduct
Fix the infinitive
to conduct
show examples
an investigation and do what is right to protect the
environment
. Despite
governments
has
Verb problem
being
show examples
full of resources and the power to take action against anyone, some believe that individuals have a social responsibility to protect the living habitat. To put
differently
Correct pronoun usage
it differently
show examples
, the
environment
should be safeguarded by everyone as the
government
cannot monitor and intervene each time someone disobeys the
law
by harming
the
Correct article usage
apply
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nature.
For instance
, if an individual throws
a
Remove the article
apply
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garbage onto the street
while
no one is around might get away from the
law
, but it is not ethical or something
that is
done by a responsible citizen. In conclusion,
governments
are resourceful and have the authority to take action against anyone who breaks the
lay
Correct your spelling
law
show examples
by polluting the
environment
.
In addition
,
governments
cannot monitor and intervene each time someone
disobey
Change the verb form
disobeys
show examples
the
law
. In my opinion, protecting the
environment
is a responsibility of both the
government
and its citizens as they both have a role to play.

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coherence cohesion
The introduction lacks a clear thesis statement and does not effectively introduce the main points of the essay. The conclusion could be more conclusive and summarize the main arguments presented in the body paragraphs.
task achievement
The essay presents both views and gives a clear opinion at the end. The main points are well supported with relevant examples. However, the introduction and conclusion could be improved to better address the prompt and provide a more comprehensive response.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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