The charts below show the result of a survey about what peopel of differwncw age groups say makes them most happy

#show #survey #peopel #differwncw #age #groups

The two pie

charts

depict

outcomes

Correct article usage

the outcomes

show examples

of a survey on

Correct article usage

the

show examples

topic of what matters can satisfy

people

the most.

Overall

, the

charts

are separated by the age of

people

. In both

charts

, the most significant topics are Achievement at work and Doing hobbies

that

Correct pronoun usage

which

show examples

are almost the same proportion. And

also

cause other factions to just slightly

difference

Replace the word

different

show examples

percent

Change the spelling

per cent

show examples

. Achievement at work plays a virtual role in

people

of all ages which is over one quarter on both

charts

. Doing hobbies

also

appears in all the

charts

and took the

second

largest part which is more than 20%.

However

, The other aspects display almost the same percentage. For

people

who are under 30 years old, having a good appearance is 18%, Travelling is 15% and Othe factors is 14%.

On the other hand

for

people

who are over 30 years old has a slight difference in proportion, Financial security is just over 2%

from

Change preposition

for

show examples

A good appearance, Being with family is just under 1%

from

Change preposition

for

show examples

Travelling but Other factors have only 10% which is the smallest piece of the pie

charts

Fri Feb 28 2020

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also".

▼

Vocabulary: Replace the words charts, people with synonyms.

▼

Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "charts" was used 6 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "difference" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "go" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "go" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "almost" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "slightly" was used 2 times.

▼

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5Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

182 words

6.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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The charts below show the result of a survey about what peopel of differwncw age groups say makes them most happy

The cultures of many countries around the world becomes more similar than they used to be. What are the reasons for this trend? Is it positive or negative?

Write about the following topic: Should private schools receive government funding? Give reasons for your answer, and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. You should write at least 250 words.

75.Some people say it is government’s responsibility to transport children to school, while otheres believe parents should transport their children to school. Discuss both views and give your opinion

Getting a promotion is one of the biggest drives for people to apply themselves and work hard in the modern workplace. Why do you think people are so driven to get promotions? What other factors influence people to work hard?

learning english at school is often seen as more important than learning local languages. if these are not taught, many are at risk of dying out. in your opinion, is it important for everyone to learn english? should we try ensure the survival of local languages and, if so, how?