The charts below show the percentage of water used for different purposes in six areas of the world.

The charts below show the percentage of water used for different purposes in six areas of the world.
The chart illustrates
water
percentage used in six regions of the world for various objectives
such
as Industrial, Agricultural and Domestic.
Overall
, in Africa, Central
Asia
, South East
Asia
and South
America
water
consumption is more for Agricultural uses,
while
North
Change preposition
in North
show examples
America
and Europe
water
utilized
Add a missing verb
is utilized
show examples
for Industrial uses. The lowest percentage
usage
for Domestic. Looking at the information more specifically in South
America
percentage of
water
utilized for Agricultural was 71%,
while
North
America
and Europe utilized 39% and 53% respectively for Agricultural.
However
Add a comma
,However
show examples
the
usage
of
water
for Domestic
uses
Fix the agreement mistake
use
show examples
was less than 20% in all
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
three countries.
Moreover
, the
usage
of
water
for Industrial
uses
Fix the agreement mistake
use
show examples
was more in North
America
and Europe with 48% and 53% respectively
while
South
Change preposition
in South
show examples
America
it is only 10%.
On the other hand
, the
water
utilization in Africa, Central and South East
Asia
for Agricultural more than
other
Correct article usage
the other
show examples
two objectives, 84%, 88% 81% respectively.
Although
less than 10% of
water
is put to use for Domestic use
also
the
usage
of
water
in Africa, Central
Asia
and South East
Asia
for industrial use was less than 15%, 7%, 5%,
12
Correct word choice
and 12
show examples
% respectively.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
Vocabulary: Replace the words water, asia, america, usage with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "percentage" in your introduction.
Vocabulary: Only 4 basic words for charts were used.
Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 3 times.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • consumption
  • irrigation
  • domestic
  • industrial
  • regional disparity
  • economic structure
  • sustainable management
  • water-scarce
  • population density
  • urbanization
  • data trends
  • resource allocation
  • percentage distribution
  • extremes
  • variations
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