IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

All over the world, the rich are becoming richer and the poor are becoming poorer. What problems does this cause? How can we overcome the problems of poverty? Use specific reason and example to explain to your answers.

I think it is completely true and we can immediately decide on these problematic situations. If
this
Linking Words
 situation continues to more timing, it will be more to different rich and poor countries. I have 2 reasons to be about that. The
first
Linking Words
 one is to be a fair competition. Every day, every
country
Use synonyms
 is developing gradually and more. New technologies appear more quickly in the 21st century. Powerful countries have new technologies more than poor countries and for implementing all kinds of big projects have chosen the best one for the competition from other companies and countries. Unfortunately, most of the big projects had chosen for rich countries because of new technologies and more experiences.
This
Linking Words
 situation gives a chance to develop more in other countries. I think we should change to
this
Linking Words
 system for developing poor countries. Another one is to be a
market
Use synonyms
 place. If you notice, the
population
Use synonyms
 directly depends on
country
Use synonyms
 developer.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, it means your
country
Use synonyms
's
population
Use synonyms
 is large, it may be a more developed
country
Use synonyms
. Because more
population
Use synonyms
 has a more
market
Use synonyms
 like China, India, etc.
For example
Linking Words
, so many production factories want to sell countries that have more
population
Use synonyms
. As like
this
Linking Words
, you have a production to want to sell, you want to go to more
market
Use synonyms
 countries. Even though, poor countries should increase to new factories.
Country
Use synonyms
 of manufacture is easy to develop to sell other countries to their production. Maybe those countries can save more time to develop.
Also
Linking Words
, we should be more educated. It is so important to a condition in my view. Because, you have a high ability as creating new apps, technologies, etc., you can sell your programs to the world
market
Use synonyms
 via the internet. And
then
Linking Words
, I think that countries should increase to the research centre. Powerful research centres can appear more quickly new things as a vaccine, things what we need. Increasing the
population
Use synonyms
 is a too difficult process in our generation for developing poor countries. That’s why, when we increase to research centres, factories, and education, we can compete with rich countries. I want to say a sentence is “the education is the most powerful weapon to change in the world”.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: