IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4.5

Some people think that they can learn better by themselves than with a teacher. Others think that it is always better to have a teacher. Which do you prefer? Use specific reasons to develop your essay.

#people #teacher
People are learning
through
Change preposition
throughout
show examples
 their entire
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
show examples
. Our first
teachers
 in most cases are our parents. They teach us to walk, speak, behave ourselves, etc. They with great patience pass down their knowledge and experience to their
children
. There is no doubt that we need our parents to learn essential things. Parents giving their knowledge prepare
children
 to join the “real world”. So, at
this
 point we need
teachers
 to learn some basic things. When
children
 go to a school or college they have there many
teachers
 who help them study more difficult and complicated things. Personally, I think that young people need
teachers
 because in most cases they basically do not understand yet the importance of learning some “uninteresting things”
such
 as logic, literature,
grammatics
Correct your spelling
grammar
, etc. So,
teachers
 keep
children
 on track and sometimes make them learn. I think, at adolescence
Add a comma
,
show examples
young people need
teachers
 because they help them develop and improve themselves in order to succeed in life.
However
, I believe that when a person is no longer a child and he has a job and lives an independent life he can choose how he is going to study. As for me, my choice between
studding
Correct your spelling
studying
show examples
 by myself or with somebody’s help depends on a teacher. If a teacher has very interesting lectures and gives many examples from different resources I will attend his or her classes with great pleasure.
However
, if a teacher has dry and boring lectures and does not try to make them interesting I will get some books and study
this
 subject by myself. It saves me time and probably some money if I take books
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
 a library.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: