IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

The chart and table below give information about population figures in Japan. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

The chart and table below give information about population figures in Japan. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
#information #population #figures #japan #summarise #features #comparisons
The bar chart and table
illusrate
Correct your spelling
illustrate
illustrates
that
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
the past, present and future
population
 of
japan
 from 1950 to 2055,
ratio
Correct article usage
the ratio
show examples
 of
population
Correct article usage
the population
show examples
 aged 65 years or above in
millions
. In starting
Change the article
the
show examples
year
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
1955,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Japan
's
population
 was only 84.1
Fix the agreement mistake
million
show examples
millions
Correct your spelling
million
show examples
 as the years
passing
Wrong verb form
passed
show examples
 the
population
also
increasing
Wrong verb form
increased
show examples
 till 2015.
During
Change preposition
From
show examples
 1995 to 2015
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Japan
's
population
 increased almost by 41
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
,
however
 from 1990 to 2015 there is increasing in
population
 but
very
Correct article usage
a very
show examples
 slow rate as
compare
Change the form of the verb
compared
show examples
 to 1950 to 1995.
Therefore
, after
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
2015
Japan
's
population
 start
declaine
Correct your spelling
decline
 till 2055 at
very
Add an article
a very
show examples
 high rate from 124.4 to 89.9
Change to singular
million
show examples
millions
.
On the other hand
,
Japan
's
population
 aged 65 years or higher
keep
Correct subject-verb agreement
keeps
show examples
 improving from 1950 to 2055 by 4.1 to 36.5
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
, as
compare
Wrong verb form
compared
show examples
 in ratio its almost only 4.1% of
total
Add an article
the total
a total
show examples
population
 of
japan
 in 1955 but in 2055 it is 41
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
. In general,
There
Fix capitalization
there
show examples
 are clearly
observe
Change the form of the verb
observed
show examples
 in
bar
Correct article usage
the bar
show examples
chat
Correct your spelling
chart
show examples
 that
Population
Correct article usage
the Population
show examples
 of
japan
 is increasing in past ,
decrease
Wrong verb form
decreasing
show examples
 in future and
almost
Add a missing verb
is almost
show examples
 constant at present. People whose age is 65 and above
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
keep increasing from 1955 to 2055.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words population, japan, millions with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "compare" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "present" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "ratio" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "almost" was used 3 times.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: