IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5.5

The two maps below show road access to a city hospital in 2007 and in 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words.

The two maps below show road access to a city hospital in 2007 and in 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words.
#two #maps #show #road #access #city #summarise #information #features #comparisons
The maps compare
road
 access to a hospital in the 3-year period from 2007 to 2010 which was changed with the reconstruction of the main
road
. As
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
can be seen on the first map, there was one main
road
 (Hospital
road
) leading straight to the city hospital. On the right hand of
this
road
Add a comma
,road
show examples
 there was a car park for both staff and
public
Correct article usage
the public
show examples
 in 2007. On the left hand of the Hospital
road
Add a comma
,road
show examples
 there was nothing back in 2007
comparing
Wrong verb form
compared
show examples
 with a bus station in 2010. Looking more closely at the maps, we can see that the Hospital
road
 was changed in 2010 by
building
Add an article
the building
show examples
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
two roundabouts which were connected with the bus station. One of them was at the cross of the Ring
road
 and the Hospital
road
 in the North. The other one was at the cross of the City
road
 and the Hospital
road
 in the South. The parking area to the East of the main
road
 did not change
it's
Replace the word
its
show examples
 location but
this
 car park
transformed
Add a missing verb
was transformed
show examples
 for staff only. Whilst the public could leave their automobiles on
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
new parking to the East of the city hospital.
Submitted by lizohkam007 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Linking words: Add some linking words.
▼
Linking words: Add more linking words.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words road with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Only 3 basic words for charts were used.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "maps" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "changed" was used 3 times.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: