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Band 4.5

the pie charts below give information about world population in 1900 and 2000

the pie charts below give information about world population in 1900 and 2000
#information #world #population
The two pie charts illustrate changes in the
population
 of different areas of the planet between 1900 and 2000. The major regions are represented as percentages of the total world
population
.
Overall
, the pie charts represent a tremendous increase
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
 the Earth’s
population
, most of the growth occurred in developing countries.
Asia
 as a region was the most populated
while
 the smallest number of
people
 lived in the African continent. In
details
Fix the agreement mistake
detail
show examples
, the
ratio
 of Asian and European regions declined over the century. Europe’s
ratio
 dropped from 25% to 14%,
while
Asia
 declined from 60% to 54%.
On the other hand
, the
percentage
 of
people
 living in
Africa
 more than doubled from 4.5% to 10%,
while
 Latin
America’s
 proportion almost tripled in the same period (from 1900 to 2000). North
America’s
percentage
,
howeverhowever
Correct your spelling
however however
, remained constant at 5% in 1900 and 2000. The Middle East and North
Africa
, a new category in 2000, represented 6% of
world
Add an article
the world
show examples
population
.
Overall
, the pie charts represent a tremendous increase
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
 the Earth’s
population
, most of the growth occurred in developing countries.
Asia
 as a region was the most populated
while
 the smallest number of
people
 lived on the African continent. In
details
Fix the agreement mistake
detail
show examples
, the
ratio
 of Asian and European regions declined over the century. Europe’s
ratio
 dropped from 25% to 14%,
while
Asia
 declined from 60% to 54%.
On the other hand
, the
percentage
 of
people
 living in
Africa
 more than doubled from 4.5% to 10%,
while
 Latin
America’s
 proportion almost tripled in the same period (from 1900 to 2000). North
America’s
percentage
,
however
, remained constant at 5% in 1900 and 2000. The Middle East and North
Africa
, a new category in 2000, represented 6% of
world
Add an article
the world
show examples
population
.
Submitted by bammesdilia24 on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "on the other hand, overall, while".
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Basic structure: Use less body paragraphs.
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Replace the words population, asia, people, ratio, percentage, africa, america’s with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "charts" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "represented" was used 5 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentages" was used 5 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "ratio" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "declined" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "growth" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "remained" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "almost" was used 2 times.
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