IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4.5

The two maps below show an island, before and after the construction of some tourist facilities. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The two maps below show an island, before and after the construction of some tourist facilities. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#two #maps #show #island #construction #tourist #facilities #summarise #information #features #comparisons
Both maps
ıllustrate
Correct your spelling
illustrate
 an
island
’s changes, before and after the reorganization of tourism. As can be seen on the maps, an
island
 was unused,
whereas
 the
second
 map shows that loads of new buildings
has
Change the verb form
have
show examples
 been added. The total length of
island
Add an article
the island
show examples
 is 100 metres.
It is clear that
 the middle of
area
Add an article
the area
show examples
 was uninhabited,
however
Add the comma(s)
,however
show examples
 the east and
west
surrended
Correct your spelling
surrounded
 with trees,
additionally
, the end of the
west
 part had a beach. Moving to the
second
 one, except
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 the
west
Replace the word
western
show examples
 part, the whole area has almost changed. The accommodation areas appear
the
Change preposition
in the
show examples
 middle and the
west
 of the
island
.
Moreover
, there are
Add an article
a restaurant
show examples
restaurant
Fix the agreement mistake
restaurants
show examples
,
reception
Correct word choice
and reception
show examples
 where are situated side by side. The modes of transportation are the
foothpaths-the
Correct your spelling
footpaths-the
 main roads among houses,
as well as
 to railway-which links to
Pier-Reception-Restaurant
Correct article usage
the Pier-Reception-Restaurant
show examples
 roadway. By the way, the pier is in the south of
island
Add an article
the island
show examples
.
By contrast
,
beach
Add an article
the beach
show examples
 did not use
as
Change preposition
for
show examples
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
swimming.
Overall
,
an
Correct article usage
the
show examples
island
 is currently based on
as
Change preposition
apply
show examples
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 tourism industry, the man-made activity has expanded.
Submitted by gismetaliyeva on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "second".
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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words island, west with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 4 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "maps" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "changes" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fifth paragraph.
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