Financial education should be a mandatory component of the school program. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?
It is obvious that financial
literacy
plays crucial
role in every aspect of daily Add an article
a crucial
life
and even business
and economy. Some people
said despite of
the importance of financial Change preposition
apply
literacy
, it should not be added as an education
factor to the school
program
. However
, others believe that financial education
should a
mandatory component of the Add a missing verb
be a
school
program
. I completely agree that financial education
should be the
mandatory part of the Correct article usage
a
school
curriculum.
Some people
believe that financial education
is not so important in the life
of a person. Hence
, students
and pupil should focus their attention on some general subjects
or should focus on some specific subject in which they would like to be an expert. Adding some extra components as a mandatory subject in school
program
can lead to Fix the agreement mistake
programs
Correct article usage
the lose
lose
Replace the word
loss
the
attention of Change preposition
of the
students
from other important subjects
. For example
, it is better to be master
in one Correct article usage
a master
business
sector, than knowing
a little bit Change the verb form
to know
in
different situations. Change preposition
about
Moreover
, in modern life
it is Add a comma
life,
difficult
to learn Correct quantifier usage
more difficult
the
different aspects and Correct article usage
apply
subjects
than learning
one. So, the specialist will have not Change the verb form
to learn
wide
range of skills and knowledge, but Correct article usage
a wide
deep
Correct article usage
a deep
On the other hand
, learning different subjects
could be helpful in different life
or work conditions. The
specialist who is aware of various phases, Correct article usage
A
aspects
of one job could be helpful to the Correct word choice
and aspects
business
,
because Remove the comma
apply
this
specialist will see the whole image of business
and understand how they are doing it and especially why they doing it. So, it creates Add an article
the business
a business
win-win
Correct article usage
a win-win
situations
and helps to gain maximum profit from Fix the agreement mistake
situation
this
situation. Even in the
daily Correct article usage
apply
life
financial literacy
could be handy. Because people
in daily routine will face the
Correct article usage
apply
situation
where it is crucial to be aware of finance. Fix the agreement mistake
situations
For instance
, negotiations about payment or salary, tax calculations or even building own small business
. Furthermore
, it is necessary to give school
students
possibility
of learning different Add an article
the possibility
subject
, because Fix the agreement mistake
subjects
school
students
are not sure in which sphere they will work or even they
can change their Correct word choice
if they
mind
in the future and change their major
In conclusion, financial Fix the agreement mistake
minds
education
has both pros and cons. In my opinion, the advantages are more significant than the disadvantages, making financial literacy
an advisable component of the school
program
. The disadvantages should be thought of as a certain price that young people
have to pay due to
the characteristics of the world that we live in.Submitted by [email protected] on
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coherence cohesion
Ensure a clear structure with separate paragraphs for introduction, body, and conclusion. Use transition words to improve clarity and coherence.
task response
Provide specific examples and arguments to support your ideas, and ensure that all aspects of the task prompt are addressed.
Word Count
IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.
A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.
Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.