IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6

Some people say that children should go to school as young as possible, while others believe that children should go to school when they are at least seven years old. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#people #children #school #seven #years
It is argued that whether toddlers should attend
school
 as soon as possible or whether they should attend
school
 when they are at least 7 years old.
This
 essay will discuss both sides of
this
 argument and
then
 I will give my own perspective which is that children should only go to
school
 when they are at 7. There are many reasons why so many parents want their
Correct your spelling
child
child's
childs
Correct your spelling
children
show examples
 to go to
school
 early. One of the main reasons is that parents don’t have time to take care of their kids as they have to go to work a lot to take care of their financial matters.
Therefore
, their priority choice is sending them to kindergarten. Another reason is that most parents believed that taking their kids to
school
 early will create a good knowledge base for them with the help of their teacher’s instruction.
A recent
Remove the article
Recent
show examples
 research pointed out that children who attend
school
 early tend to pay more attention to the lessons at
school
 compared to those who attend
school
 later. Many people
also
 believed that until children are 7
then
 they are old enough to go to
school
. Children should have an ordinary childhood
such
 as playing video games, having fun with their neighbours, friends without looking at any subject books.
Consequently
, it will create sweet memories of their life and improve their creativity as well as develop their personality in a positive way.
In addition
, learning subjects like Mathematics or Physics early can be miserable for them when they have not fully-developed which will later make children lose interest in learning and may impact their learning method in the future. In conclusion, I think that both sides of the ideals have their merits.
However
, on balance
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 believe that children should be sent to
school
 at 7, as
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 feel it will ensure children can enjoy both personality development and academic achievements.
Submitted by Mr.W on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: