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Writing Samples /
Band 5

Some people who have been in prison become good citizens later, and it is often argued that these are the best people to talk to teenagers about the dangers of committing a crime. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #prison #citizens #teenagers #dangers #crime
It is true that ex-prisoners can become normal, productive members of society. Some
people
 believe those
people
 are the most suitable one to have a talk with adolescents about
d
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angers of committing a crime. From my perspective, I completely agree that those
people
 should talk to
teenagers
 for the purpose of discouraging them from breaking the law. On the one hand,
teenagers
 are more likely to accept advice from someone who can speak from experience. Reformed offenders can tell young
people
 about how they involved in crime, the dangers of
c
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a
the
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riminal lifestyle, and what life in prison is really like. While
teenagers
 are often indifferent to the guidance given by older
people
, most of
s
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the
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tudents are keen to hear the stories of an ex-offender. The vivid and shocking nature of these stories is likely to have a powerful impact.
On the other hand
,
the
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alternative methods to guide adolescents are less effective. One option would be for officers
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to
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isit
s
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the
a
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chool and discuss with
students
 there, which can give information about how they caught criminals and suggest to peers from an authority
side
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site
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. The
second
 method tends to be for schoolteachers
s
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to
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peak to their
students
 about crime, but effectiveness is doubted as
students
 might not see teachers as a credible source of information.
Finally
, educational films can be used, but there is no opportunity for
students
 to interact. In conclusion, I fully agree that ex-prisoners should talk to
teenagers
 in their school
,
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 since it is the most effective and efficient way to deter
teenagers
 from committing crimes.
Submitted by Esther on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • prisoners
  • rehabilitation
  • recidivism
  • consequences
  • insights
  • deterrent
  • guidance
  • support
  • role models
  • positive change
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