IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Somepeople say that advertising is extremely successful at persuading us to buy things. Others think advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention to it.

Being a developing era, there is an enormous increase in advertisement via Facebook, Instagram, television and radio etc. Most
advertisements
Use synonyms
 really persuade us to buy things if we want to raise our standard of living. Nowadays , many people invest so much money in advertising for their own businesses and they advertise their products ,their services , and their businesses in many ways on social media. On the one hand, if the
advertisements
Use synonyms
 really help to give us the quality of products and services we buy that they claimed for , (1) we will be improved our standard of living,(2) we will not be wasted the time doing anything , (3) we will get more opportunities for people to do works.
Firstly
Linking Words
, if you see some
advertisements
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 that are useful indeed for you and your home on social media and you buy these things and use them, you will get smarter , and more beautiful, and you can easily work your jobs without any effort.
Secondly
Linking Words
, we spend less time doing some work,
for example
Linking Words
 using smart keys
instead
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 of locks and keys, vacuum cleaner
instead
Linking Words
 of a broom, washing machine and dishwasher
instead
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 of your hands. The
third
Linking Words
 factor is its increase in the number of workers needed to supply the goods and
therefore
Linking Words
 provide employment. People will get more opportunities in their lives or work through
advertisements
Use synonyms
.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
advertisements
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 make us feel depressed and discontented with our ordinary lives when we don't have much money to spend on luxury things. Everyone tends to dream of having a better life, better educated, more successful , wealthier, better looking, more adventurous and so on. Some
advertisements
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 make us believe that our dreams will come true if we use their products. Not every advertisement is a good one. Some are meaningless. Some are unreasonable and pointless. These stupid
advertisements
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 can't keep the quality of the product that they claimed for it. We don't,
therefore
Linking Words
, need to pay any attention to it. In my opinion , spending money on advertising will assist a rapid distribution of goods to all customers all over the world.
Therefore
Linking Words
, Advertising is a good way to achieve our goals rapidly in our won lives or businesses.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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