IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

everybody should donate some amount of their income for support charity

every person should
to
Change the verb form
apply
show examples
give some amount of their income
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
 support charity. I
Believe
Fix capitalization
believe
show examples
 there are some justifiable arguments to agree with it.
One
Correct your spelling
On
show examples
 the one hand, when everybody
donate
Change the verb form
donates
show examples
some
persentage
Correct your spelling
percentage
 of their income to charity have many advantages. First and foremost, social aid. They can give their
money
Use synonyms
 to poor families, and through
this
Linking Words
, they can support social equality.
Furthermore
Linking Words
,
as a result
Linking Words
 of helping someone, they may become confident, and
also
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
 may bring about happiness,
mental
Correct word choice
and mental
show examples
 complicancy.
Moreover
Linking Words
, it is people
who
Correct pronoun usage
whose
show examples
 mental well-being can do their work with satisfaction and without tiredness, which is why, they may earn more
money
Use synonyms
.
This
Linking Words
 is
also
Linking Words
 mentioned
many
Change preposition
in many
show examples
 scientific and religious books.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, giving some parts of
Use synonyms
money
Correct article usage
the money
show examples
Add a missing verb
is
show examples
beneficial for the government
due to
Linking Words
 they can'
t
Use synonyms
 provide
whole
Change preposition
for whole
show examples
 of the indigent
person
Fix the agreement mistake
people
show examples
, so some
family
Fix the agreement mistake
families
show examples
 may suffer from not
enough
Add a missing verb
having enough
show examples
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
cash. Some people may be sick and they may
don'
Verb problem
not
show examples
t
Use synonyms
 have
money
Use synonyms
 for medical
check up
Correct your spelling
check-ups
show examples
.
As a result
Linking Words
, their children may stay alone and can'
t
Use synonyms
 study well,
also
Linking Words
, they too may not be able to find more income.
Additionally
Linking Words
, growing poor society may have
bad
Correct article usage
a bad
show examples
affect
Replace the word
effect
show examples
to
Change preposition
on
show examples
 developing the. country since they can'
t
Use synonyms
to
Change the verb form
apply
show examples
do something,
also
Linking Words
, the government may not be able to
invests
Change the verb
invest
show examples
money
Use synonyms
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
 build buildings and
co-operate
Correct your spelling
cooperate
show examples
 with other countries to start something
due to
Linking Words
can
Verb problem
apply
show examples
focus only poor population. In conclusion, if
every body
Correct your spelling
everybody
show examples
channel
Change the verb form
channels
show examples
their
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
some amount of
money
Use synonyms
 to support
charity
Add an article
the charity
show examples
 can
useful
Add a missing verb
be useful
show examples
both
Change preposition
to both
show examples
government
Correct article usage
the government
show examples
 and indigent individuals .

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task achievement
Your introduction could be clearer by stating your position directly. Additionally, ensure to use the correct form, as 'every person should give' is preferable to 'should to give.'
coherence and cohesion
Focus on using complete sentences with proper structure. For example, 'The social aid can support social equality among poorer families.'
task achievement
Use more specific examples or statistics to strengthen your arguments, such as citing specific charities or data relating to the impact of donations.
coherence and cohesion
Improving transition words can help the flow; for example, 'Furthermore', 'On the other hand', and 'Additionally' are good but try to vary your transitions and use them correctly.
task achievement
The essay presents a clear argument in favor of charitable donations, which is a good start for task achievement.
coherence and cohesion
You have shown awareness of both perspectives, considering the benefits to individuals and society, which enriches the essay.

Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.

A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).

Stick to this essay structure:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Economic equality
  • Wealth gap
  • Redistributing resources
  • Social responsibility
  • Mandatory donations
  • Financial strain
  • Voluntary donations
  • Morality
  • Ethics
  • Efficient use of resources
  • Sporadic contributions
  • Implementation challenges
  • Compliance
  • Fixed amount
What to do next:
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