Nowadays many people go shopping in their free time. Shopping has replaced many other activities that people used to choose as their hobby. What are the reasons for this? Is this a positive or negative development?
These days a number of
people
go shopping in their leisure time
. it has been considered a hobby
. It can lead to consequences
. this
essay will discuss some reasons for this
case and the negative consequences
that it can lead to.
On the one hand, the majority of people
love to shopping In their leisure time
. since it is grand of their society. For example
, the majority are female they all the time
use their smartphone and use Instagram, and TikTok there are advertisements for clothes, cosmetics, jewelry
, etc. Change the spelling
jewellery
Moreover
, even if they give an offer for that. therefore
they are going to the shopping. Secondly
, the shopping center
has more facilities. Change the spelling
centre
For example
, there are places where parents can keep their kids playing while
they go shopping. it consequences
it becomes easier and funnier to shop at the mall.
On the other hand
, this
uses shopping as a hobby
. it can have a very negative effect such
as spending a lot of money and their time
. However
, it can be replaced by other activities. shopping can be unhealthy because there are no benefits. end of the day they were very exhausted. Therefore
, they can do other activities. For instance
, can read books, do a sport do yoga, etc. so using shopping as a hobby
can be considered a negative development.
In conclusion, the reason for more and more shopping people
is as a hobby
it become increasing for advertising and their facilities. This
comes from bad consequences
for people
.Submitted by ma.ushamanu1024 on
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Coherence and Cohesion
A great effort in discussing both the reasons and the consequences of shopping as a hobby. To enhance clarity, working on sentence structure and avoiding repetition can improve the flow of ideas.
Task Achievement
Clarify and expand on your examples to strengthen your argument. This will add depth to your essay and help in comprehensively covering the topic.
Topic Coverage
Your essay addressed the topic well by discussing the reasons behind the trend of shopping as a hobby and its implications.
Structure
You made an effort to structure your essay with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, which is commendable.
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