In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an ageing population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people. To what extent do the advantages of having an ageing population outweigh the disadvantages?

Over the
last
few decades, the increasing ageing population has long been a subject in many countries. Some people contend that the phenomenon could have positive influences on various aspects of our societies,
while
others believe that
this
could lead to detrimental consequences. In
this
essay, I will address two diametrically opposed views
,
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and reason out the conclusion.
First,
there is an obvious benefit
that is
worth considering. The elderly have a wide range of experiences and knowledge in society.
Hence
, they can be consultants to the youngsters who are seeking
for
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advice. To illustrate, based on my experience, my grandmother raised me and she always taught me how to make wide decisions. When I had a big dispute with my friend, she judged that was actually my fault, and gave me some advice on how to solve
this
problem. I accepted it, and
consequently
, it made a satisfying result. In spite of the merit described above,
this
could lead to adverse negative repercussions. To start with, the outgoings of the government on senior citizens' welfare and caregiving costs a fortune from a socio-economic perspective. The more the number of them goes up, the more the young generations should pay extra taxes for them.
For instance
, in Korea, the birth rate dipped to 0.6
last
year.
According to
this
, many experts predict that the ageing population will rise very sharply within 10 years.
As a result
, it will charge monumental taxes to the youngsters to raise a fund of yearly pensions for them. In conclusion, it can be observed that there are two contradicting viewpoints, which are both, to a certain degree, convincing.
Although
it can offer some merits, it seems to me that its risks far outweigh its potential benefits.
Therefore
, I consider the advantages of
this
trend do not
outweight
Correct your spelling
outweigh
the disadvantages.
Submitted by mirea0124 on

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task achievement
You have provided a clear response to the task and addressed both sides of the argument effectively. However, you could further elaborate on the disadvantages for a more balanced discussion.
coherence cohesion
Your essay is well-organized with a clear introduction and conclusion. The main points are supported but could use a bit more depth. Work on providing additional specific examples and explanations to strengthen your argument.
coherence cohesion
The logical structure of your essay is clear and easy to follow. Transitions between paragraphs are smooth, and the essay flows well from one idea to the next.
task achievement
You have effectively summarized both sides of the argument and concluded with your own opinion. This demonstrates a comprehensive understanding of the task.

Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic

Problem-and-solution essays fall naturally into two parts, the first describing and exploring the problem, the second setting out the solution or solutions.

You essay structure should look something like this:

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – Problems
  • Body paragraph 2 – Solutions
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • One of the first problems of the...
  • Another problem that needs to be considered...
  • A possible solution to this problem would be...
  • One immediate practical solution is to...

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • ageing population
  • benefits
  • disadvantages
  • advantages
  • experience
  • knowledge
  • contribution
  • economy
  • society
  • healthcare
  • youth employment
  • community
  • intergenerational support
  • volunteerism
  • mentorship
  • increased demand
  • pension costs
  • social welfare systems
  • workforce
  • productivity
  • intergenerational conflict
  • technological adaptability
  • dependency
  • effective
  • skill development
  • employment opportunities
  • intergenerational solidarity
  • communication
  • lifelong learning
  • technological literacy
  • age-friendly
  • social policies
  • infrastructure
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