The media has become too influential in people’s lives today and this is a negative development. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

As the
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The
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rise of social
media
Add a comma
media,
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it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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is known for
to
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apply
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influencing people's lives and has created negative
developement
Correct your spelling
development
. I believe it is true and completely agree with
this
statement, I will provide
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
reasonable facts to support my claim. The
media
is
Wrong verb form
has been
show examples
known for connecting us for a long time now, providing us
news
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with news
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and
about
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apply
show examples
information and entertainment all around us.
However
,
media
can shape people's
opinion
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opinions
show examples
and perceptions about the facts
for instance
currently facts are changed by the news
media
control changing the realistic story into
manupulating
Correct your spelling
manipulating
into supporting a targeted political party for their personal gains.
Moreover
, the
media
can manipulate and distort information.
Furthermore
,
Media
is
also
known for creating and promoting some unrealistic standards and ideals
for example
media
is currently known for making unrealistic standards of men in front of women making it difficult to connect and
taking
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take
show examples
their natural course of choosing mating
partner
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partners
show examples
. In conclusion, the
media
is
beneficial
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a beneficial
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byproduct for providing information and entertainment.
However
, the demerit weighs more
then
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than
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the merit, showing
evidences
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evidence
pieces of evidence
shreds of evidence
show examples
that it
creating
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creates
show examples
unrealistic and unnatural virtual that can lie about the truth and
creating
Wrong verb form
create
show examples
a negative
deveopment
Correct your spelling
development
towards
propulation
Correct your spelling
population
.
Submitted by nick on

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task achievement
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coherence cohesion
Improve the logical structure of your essay. Ensure that each paragraph flows smoothly into the next and that there's a clear progression of ideas.
coherence cohesion
Pay attention to grammar and language use. Try to avoid grammatical errors and awkward phrasing to improve readability.
coherence cohesion
You have included both an introduction and a conclusion, which is essential for a well-structured essay.
task achievement
Your essay addresses the task prompt and expresses a clear viewpoint on the issue.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • influential
  • negative development
  • opinions
  • perceptions
  • unrealistic standards
  • ideals
  • manipulate
  • distort
  • information
  • addiction
  • dependency
  • privacy
  • valuable
  • entertainment
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