Art classes, such as painting and drawing, are so important to child’s development as other subjects, so it should be compulsory in high schools. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
It is widely known that
art
courses, including drawing and painting, take a vital role in fostering a child’s skills like other subjects
, so some believe that high schools must add this
subject. This
writer strongly disagrees with this
statement to some extent.
Admittedly, there are many reasons why art
must be added to the curriculum. Chief of these is that it enhances students’ imagination. Therefore
, this
indirectly helps them be able to find many different approaches to a problem in other subjects
like Math, for example
. Moreover
, it is a suitable one that helps children unwind after a very long stressful time at school. By doing this
, they are no longer suffering great stress and can maintain their study effectively instead
of playing video games or watching many films at home.
Despite the benefits mentioned above, the drawbacks of art
are more considerable, indeed, many students just prefer theoretical subjects
to art
ones, so if they are forced to study it, it can be inevitable that they feel bored and do not totally focus on the lessons. Thus
, this
is likely to deprive them of learning what subjects
they want, leading to a waste of time. Furthermore
, just a few artists nowadays can be successful in painting, so art
is not a necessary one
, compared to Physics or chemistry. Correct pronoun usage
apply
As a result
, it should be an optional rather than compulsory one.
In conclusion, given the enhancement of imagination skills and alleviation of stress, I do understand why art
should become an indispensable subject in schools’ curricula. However
, it may make children who are into other ones waste their time and bring negligible benefits and success in becoming an artist.Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
task response
Ensure that your position on the topic is clearly stated and maintained throughout the essay. The phrase 'strongly disagrees with this statement to some extent' is confusing and contradictory. Consider rephrasing it to present a clear stance.
task response
Include more specific examples to strengthen your arguments. While general reasons are provided, specific examples or studies illustrating the points can make your argument more compelling.
coherence cohesion
Aim to integrate your ideas more seamlessly. Ensure that each paragraph transitions smoothly to the next, guiding the reader through your argument without abrupt changes.
coherence cohesion
Check for minor grammatical errors to improve clarity and flow. For instance, 'it is a suitable one that helps children unwind' can be simplified to 'it helps children unwind.'
coherence cohesion
Introduction and conclusion are effectively present, framing the essay well.
coherence cohesion
Main points are logically structured and follow a clear progression.
task response
Your ideas are generally clear and understandable, contributing to a coherent argument.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?