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Band 5.5

Once children start school,teachers have more influence on their intellectual and social development. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#children #school #teachers #influence #development
Children
 learn various knowledge and
skills
 from
adults
Correct article usage
the adults
show examples
 around them. Some people think that the influence of
teachers
 in terms of
students
' cognitive and social improvement is more significant than that of the student's
parents
 upon the commencement of study at academic institutions. In my personal opinion,
while
 the role of
teachers
 in assisting
children
's development is recognised,
students
 are primarily influenced by their
parents
. The importance of the teacher's role in providing
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
guidance is well recognised.
Children
 learn how to interact with peers and obtain new academic theories and
skills
 through classroom activities.
For example
, in case of conflict between
children
 at school, it is the teacher's responsibility to solve the issue and give
children
 a lesson.
Nonetheless
, they have a responsibility for all the
students
 in a classroom,
hence
, I believe that
teachers
 should focus on providing basic academic information and
skills
 and cooperate with
parents
 in developing them
further
.
Children
's behaviour often reflects
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
their family members. It is true that
students
 with compromised family
background
Fix the agreement mistake
backgrounds
show examples
 often have behavioural issues at school,
for instance
.
While
teachers
 can contribute to fixing the issue, it cannot be fully solved without parental support.
In addition
, as
teachers
 are there to provide basic knowledge and
skills
,
parents
 should assist their
children
 in consolidating these
skills
 learnt in a classroom. In conclusion,
while
children
 are assisted by
teachers
 at school in gaining basic knowledge and
skills
, it is predominantly
parents
 who influence their
children
. Henceforth,
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
mutual understanding and
a
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apply
show examples
cooperation between
teachers
 and
parents
 are critical in
giving
Verb problem
having
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positive
Correct article usage
a positive
show examples
 influence on pupils.
Submitted by sugarmixxxx on

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example
Try to provide more detailed and specific examples to support your points, particularly discussing more instances where parents have a bigger impact on children's intellectual and social development.
sentence structure
Always ensure that sentences are well-structured and concise. A few sentences in your essay were a bit convoluted, affecting the clarity of your argument.
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