The charts show what Australian school leavers did immediately after leaving secondary school. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The charts show what Australian school leavers did immediately after leaving secondary school. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
The given pie charts presented information on the percentage of the activities pursued by Australian
students
after completing secondary
schools
Fix the agreement mistake
school
show examples
in the
year
Fix the agreement mistake
years
show examples
1980, 1990 and 2000. A glance at the graphs reveals that enrolling in
further
education and working were the two main choices for Australian
students
while
unemployment played a minor part. Among the three destinations, the number of unemployed
students
was the least at only 10% of the total graduates in 1980.
Although
,
Remove the comma
apply
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these saw an increase to 12% in 1990,
it
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
fell back to 8% in 2000. Meanwhile, continuing higher education and taking a job took turns in order of being the most popular option for school leavers. In detail, half of all
students
leaving secondary school decided higher academic pursuit to be their first preference in 1980 but
this
choice became less attractive in the following years with 38% and 37% continuing their
further
studies in 1990 and 2000, respectively.
By contrast
, only 40% of
students
graduating from secondary schools took a job right away in 1980 but
these
Correct determiner usage
this
show examples
proportion increased to 50% in 1990 and reached a peak of 55% in the final year

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "further".
Vocabulary: Replace the words students with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 2 times.
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