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Band 7.5

Some people think certain prisoners should be made to do unpaid community work instead of being put behind the bar. To what extent do you agree?

#people #prisoners #community #work #bar
In order to create a safe and sustainable environment, officials should reform the
society
. I do agree up to some extent that those criminals who commit low level crime must be made to do unpaid work. While, severe criminals should be put behind the bars. There are a number of ways available where certain prisoners / criminals can be assigned an unpaid work
instead
 of putting them behind the bars.
For instance
, cleaning streets, planting trees and working for charity are suitable tasks where these offenders may be asked to do
such
 works.
This
 may help to reduce the environmental problems and provide opportunities to lawbreakers to keep themselves engaged in
society
 beneficial activities.
Although
,
this
 strategy may increase in number of crimes because the offenders feel themselves free even after doing wrong things, but in parallel,
this
 is
this
 is quite an effective way to make
such
 criminals realize to tread on the right path.
On the contrary
, the brutal Offenders who are involved in serious Crime like Murder, Hijacking, Rape, Abduction and so on / the like / so forth on, they must be punished and put behind bars in order to set an example in the
society
 so that no one can be able to take
such
 wrong steps to ruin anyone’s life.
Besides
this
, the nature of crime should be taken into account.
For example
, if a child steals food from a store as his mother is starving incompletely a different scenario than someone robbing an old lady. The former deserves a
second
 chance while the
second
 should be imprisoned. To recapitulate, someone with no criminal record and if found in slight misconduct must be treated differently than serious killers. The objective of the law is to maintain peace in the
society
, not to punish people.
Thus unpaid
Accept comma addition
Thus, unpaid
 community services are a great chance for criminals to bring them back to their normal life.
Submitted by Jaspreet Jassu on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Rehabilitation
  • Constructive
  • Vocational skills
  • Cost-effective
  • Incarceration
  • Financial burden
  • Community cohesion
  • Integration
  • Public safety
  • Exploitation
What to do next:
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