the table below shows us the numbers of visitors to ashdown museum during the year before and the year after i was refurbished. the charts show the result of surveys asking visitors how satisfied they were with their visit, during the same two periods. summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#numbers #visitors #ashdown #museum #year #show #surveys #visit #two #periods #summarise #information #features #comparisons
The table shows us the
visitors
to the Ashdown museum with exact numbers. From that
we can see Add a comma
,that
visitors
has been
increased Unnecessary verb
apply
due to
the refurbishment. It is almost twenty thousand visitors
more than before refurbishment. Below the table, we can see two pie charts which indicate the results of survey
Correct article usage
the survey
of
Change preposition
on
satisfaction
of the Correct article usage
the satisfaction
visitors
.
There are five different categories which are very satisfied, satisfied, dissatisfied, very dissatisfied and no response. Those charts illustrate a huge difference between the percentage before and after refurbishment with both. Very satisfied and dissatisfied.Very satisfied visitors
parsonage has increased while
dissatisfacted
Correct your spelling
dissatisfaction
dissatisfied
visitors
have decreased. If we compare satisfied visitors
and very dissatisfied it is same
as the two facts Correct article usage
the same
before
we discussed. Correct word choice
apply
Which
I meant one kind of percentage Correct pronoun usage
apply
have
grown which is satisfying and another has gone down. But the difference is Change the verb form
has
same
.
Only one category Correct article usage
the same
have
not changed Change the verb form
has
that
is the percentage of Correct pronoun usage
which
visitors
who did not answer the survey.Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
Vocabulary: Replace the words visitors with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "shows" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "charts" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "table" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "difference" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
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