In many countries, people decide to have a child at a later age. Why is this? Do the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

#countries #people #child #age #development

Nowadays, many couples are delaying

Change preposition

apply

show examples

parenthood as the job market is saturated and resources are limited to a certain class in society,

although

it has many consequences which will be discussed in

this

essay and will be explained that advantages are higher than disadvantages.

Firstly

, couples do not want to have a child in

early

Correct article usage

the early

show examples

years of marriage for the reason that many want to focus on

Correct pronoun usage

their career

show examples

career

Fix the agreement mistake

careers

show examples

and raising

financial

Correct pronoun usage

their financial

show examples

status,

accordingly

Add a comma

show examples

they can provide their offspring

Add the preposition

with a

show examples

healthy and lavish life,

along with

this

many people want to enjoy social gathering and

traveling

Change the spelling

travelling

show examples

which will be difficult after having a kid since it is hard to balance the life both ways, especially for women.

Secondly

, there are some good amount of drawbacks

Change preposition

apply

show examples

delaying to

have

Wrong verb form

having

show examples

a baby, some people believe 30 to 40 years age is perfect for making money and career growth, but having

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

offspring after 30th can cause many health issues

such

as Down syndrome, serious genetic problems. Delay in parenthood is

also

affecting children’s growth, learning and understanding

your

Change preposition

of your

show examples

younger one because of the huge gap of years

Change preposition

between

show examples

two generations, as your child is in

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

university and you are about to take the retirement which can be delayed in order to fulfil your responsibilities towards your kid.

To conclude

, it is believed that many want to delay having a child in order to have a career or financial growth

also

many want to enjoy their social life, but the benefits are healthier than

drawbacks

Correct article usage

the drawbacks

show examples

Submitted by MK on Mon Jul 20 2020

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.

A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).

Stick to this essay structure:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction
Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Do you want to check your IELTS writing?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
15Grammar mistakes
 

1 paragraphs

254 words

4.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 checks
Get all the feedback you need to keep improving your charts and letters.
Unlimited Task 2 checks
Practice and perfect your skills with essays.
Personalized suggestions
Know how to boost your score.
Detailed mistakes analysis
Get instant feedback. Spot every mistake.
Topic ideas generator
Get topic-specific ideas to enhance your writing.
Vocabulary helper
Get the right words for any topic.
Progress tracking
Track your writing improvements.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

6
band
Some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification.
It is normal for university students to specialise in one particular subject, but some of them think that they should be able to take a wide range of subjects in addition to their chosen one. This essay will look at both viewpoints, then suggest that, although there are some benefits to be gained from additional subjects, students should probably focus on their majors.
4.5
band
Some people think that in order to deal with the problem of congestion in cities, privately owned vehicles should be banned in city centers, while others consider this to be an unrealistic solution. Discus both sides and give your opinion.
Recent decades, owned private cars or motorbikes have been accepted by governments of many countries. It opened a spark of heated debate about whether vehicles should be banned in city centres to measure the problem of congestion in cities but other commuters think that is not an effective solution. My opinion is there should have no cars and motorbikes in the city centres to solve some existing environmental pollution problems and more.
6.5
band
Some people believe that the government should provide financial support to artists, such as painters and musicians, while others argue that it is a waste of money. Discuss both views and give your opinion
In today's society, the question of whether governments should allocate financial support to artists, such as painters and musicians, remains a topic of debate. Some argue that it is a waste of taxpayers' money, while others contend that it is a crucial investment in culture and creativity. In this essay, I will examine both sides of the argument and provide my opinion.
6
band
Some experts believe that it is better for children to begin learning a foreign language at primary school rather than secondary school. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?
Learning a second language has become common practice in almost all parts of the world. However, there is still no consensus as to the exact time schoolchildren should start learning a new language: at primary or secondary school? Some believe students must initially be exposed to a foreign language in primary school and I completely agree, asserting that the drawbacks of delaying far outweigh the benefits.
4.5
band
Some people believe that is the responsibility of individuals to take care of their own health Others believe that governments should make sure that citizen is healthy. Give reasons for your answer and include relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Increasing population and disease explosion are two phenomenon that go hand in hand. Health related challenges is becoming more paramount for many nations. On the one hand, there is the belief that individuals are responsible to keep themselves in good shape. On the contrary, it is thought by some that the State is solely responsible for the health of their subjects.

In many countries, people decide to have a child at a later age. Why is this? Do the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

Some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification.

Some people think that in order to deal with the problem of congestion in cities, privately owned vehicles should be banned in city centers, while others consider this to be an unrealistic solution. Discus both sides and give your opinion.

Some people believe that the government should provide financial support to artists, such as painters and musicians, while others argue that it is a waste of money. Discuss both views and give your opinion

Some experts believe that it is better for children to begin learning a foreign language at primary school rather than secondary school. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

Some people believe that is the responsibility of individuals to take care of their own health Others believe that governments should make sure that citizen is healthy. Give reasons for your answer and include relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.