Nowadays, many governments budget money for the sports industry. Why do you think governments are funding sports so heavily? Do you think this is an appropriate investment?

#governments #budget #money #sports #industry #investment

It is true that many

governments

invest their money in the

sports

industry

While

there are various reasons that the

governments

spend their budget, it is actually a positive development because

sports

can entertain

people

encouraging

Wrong verb form

encourage

show examples

their fitness and stimulate the economy. The main cause of many nations

invest

Wrong verb form

investing

show examples

in the

sports

industry

is to strengthen the country's image by sponsoring events.

Sports

is worldwide famous and popular, so it is the best place to promote their nation and image.

For example

, international

sports

contests like the

world cup

Correct your spelling

World Cup

show examples

or the Olympics

Correct subject-verb agreement

are

show examples

helpful for promotion because they can get immense attention through it. So when we are watching the Olympics on TV, we can see so many names of companies in the stadium.

Nevertheless

, I firmly believe that the increase

Change preposition

show examples

budget

Change preposition

for

show examples

the

sports

industry

has an

overall

positive effect because

sports

give enjoyment to

people

, help keep their health, and boost the economy.

Therefore

, when the government spends the budget on

sports

people

are likely to become more interested, giving

people

enjoyment.

Furthermore

, by providing citizens with something to entertain, they can relieve stress.

For example

Korean

Correct article usage

the Korean

show examples

governments

Fix the agreement mistake

government

show examples

invest

Wrong verb form

invested

show examples

in K-baseball, which makes

people

get into baseball games.

In addition

, they built several stadiums in Korea to encourage them

directly

Fix the infinitive

to directly

show examples

go and watch baseball games.

This

causes fever

Change preposition

show examples

baseball games in Korea.

To sum up

it is clear that

governments

in many nations are currently investing in the

sports

industry

However

, it affects positively because

this

gives citizens enjoyment, keeps their health, and stimulates the economy.

Submitted by alice1809 on Thu Oct 07 2021

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task response

Provide a clear and specific answer to all parts of the prompt in the introduction and conclusion.

coherence and cohesion

Ensure that there is a clear flow of ideas between sentences and paragraphs. Use transitions to connect ideas more effectively.

Fully explain your ideas

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
11Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

260 words

4.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Nowadays, many governments budget money for the sports industry. Why do you think governments are funding sports so heavily? Do you think this is an appropriate investment?

Fully explain your ideas

In some countries an increasing number of people are suffering from health problems as a result of eating too much fast food. It is therefore necessary for governments to impose a higher tax on this kind of food. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

In many countries, children are engaged in some kind of paid work. Some people regard this as completely wrong, while others consider it as valuable work experience. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Countries with along average working time are more economically successful than those countries which do not have a long working time. To what extent do you agree or disagree

It is generally accepted that families are not as close as they used to be. Give reasons why this change has happened and suggest how families could be brought closer together?

In most countries, prison is an effective solution to the problem of crime. Some people think it is a more effective solution to provide education for those who violate the law. To what extend do you agree or disagree?