In their advertising, business nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. Why this? Do you think it is positive or negative development?

#business #emphasise #products #development

These days business owners often say their

products

are new in some ways. They do

this

to get customer's attention

as well as

they want to sell more of their other

products

under the same brand. In my point of view,

this

matter is a positive development that provides more advantages.

Firstly

, business claims their

products

are new to attract customers. If they use advanced technology, more people will be interested in their

products

. They

also

want to sell more of their other

products

with the same brand.

For example

, when Apple released the iPhone, with modern technology, it became popular, and the other

products

also

gained popularity.

Secondly

, one of the obvious advantages is that makes our lives easier. In simple words, tech companies sell

products

with helpful features,

such

as watches that can make phone calls, which makes our lives better. It

also

improves our quality of life.

For instance

, people can go anywhere without getting lost thanks to the map feature on their smartphones, made possible by technology.

Thirdly

, another advantage of businesses emphasizing that their

products

are new in some way is that they keep the market competitive. When companies constantly advertise and present their

products

as new and improved, it pushes other businesses to do the same.

This

competition gives strength to companies to produce better

products

, which benefits the customers. In conclusion, getting the customer's attention with competition with other markets about

products

and boosting sales of other

products

with the same brand are the reasons why business highlights their goods. I believe

this

phenomenon has a positive development, leading to significant profits.

Submitted by despinaiapona on Thu Sep 28 2023

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coherence cohesion

Improve the usage of some transitional words, and be sure to explicitly connect all points in your argument. This would help your essay flow better and be easier to follow.

task achievement

Remember to directly answer all parts of the question. While you've addressed why businesses might emphasize the newness of their products, you didn't fully explain in depth why you believe this is a positive development.

lexical resource

Consider using a wider range of vocabulary and try to avoid repetition of phrases.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

269 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

novelty
excitement
latest trends
improvements
advancements
differentiating
competitors
innovation
progress
attracting attention
generating curiosity

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In their advertising, business nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. Why this? Do you think it is positive or negative development?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Too much emphasis is given for education of the young. More government money should be spent to free time activity of young people. To what extend do you agree or disagree?

Being overweight has become a major health concern in many parts of the world. Explain the causes for being overweight and provide solutions.

Discuss the importance of art education in schools. How does exposure to art impact students’ creativity and overall development?

Should education and healthcare be free of charge and funded by the government, or should it be the responsibility of the people to pay for these services?

Some people believe that it is better to live and work in a vertical city with multiple tall buildings, as compared to a horizontal city with fewer tall buildings. Discuss both views and give your opinion.