Some people believe it is better to raise children in the city, while others consider the countryside to be a more suitable choice. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
There is a common belief that bringing up
children
in the city is a good way, meanwhile, other people think that the countryside
is a more suitable choice. This
essay will analyze how beneficial the city is and what makes the countryside
good for children
.
I firmly believe that the countryside
plays a crucial role in preventing children
from social drawbacks. This
is because there are more and more bad guys who abuse high-tech equipment to trick other people in the cities
, therefore
the children
can easily be cheated by these guys. For instance
, criminals can use fake messages in order to borrow money from these kids and never give back. Additionally
, living in the countryside
gives children
a peaceful and clean atmosphere which is not affected too much by noise pollution or air pollution from many types of vehicles like in the city. This
is because most people in the countryside
use bikes or go on foot and there are few vehicles on the road, hence
, it can help the children
live in a safe place without noise and pollution.
Although
it is undeniable that living in the countryside
has beneficial effects, cities
give children
a modern environment which gives children
more chances to contact with technology and high-tech equipment. Thus
, children
can easily create and tackle their work or products quickly. For instance
, they can make models or create robots easily through computers and electronic tools in their school. Furthermore
, living in the cities
creates great job opportunities for children
in the future. In the cities
, most of the schools have foreign teachers who teach and communicate with their students regularly, so children
can interact more with other languages as well as
other cultures, this
will help them in the future to find a suitable job in a foreign company.
To sum up
, living in the countryside
creates children
a safe and peaceful environment, however
, cities
also
give children
more chances to contact modern facilities and foreign teachers.Submitted by Nghỉ hè vui vẻ cả nhà on
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coherence cohesion
Your essay effectively discusses both viewpoints and your own opinion, providing a balanced analysis. To further enhance your essay, consider adding more varied sentence structures and linking phrases to improve flow and demonstrate advanced language skills.
task achievement
Your examples and arguments are relevant and support your points well. To elevate your essay further, aim to integrate more specific, real-world examples to substantiate your arguments, which will add depth and persuasiveness to your response.
logical structure
The essay has a clear structure with distinct introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion, effectively guiding the reader through your arguments.
complete response
You have done a good job in presenting a clear stance and discussing both views comprehensively, demonstrating a good understanding of the task.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?
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