It can be difficult for small local shops to compete with large supermarkets and with on-line shops. How does this affect local communities? What could be done to improve this situation?

#shops #supermarkets #affect #communities #situation

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These days, the existence of large supermarkets and online

shops

Use synonyms

is dominating, making it difficult for the smaller ones to keep up with them.

This

Linking Words

essay will examine

this

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implication to local communities and measures to improve

this

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issue. First of all, both developments of big supermarkets and online

shops

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create huge disparities in society. Local small businesses are losing their attraction

as well as

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customers, resulting in not being able to generate

incomes

Fix the agreement mistake

income

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to fulfil their daily expenses.

Moreover

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, they have to establish a joint venture with a supermarket by renting a space by paying a huge amount of cost to the owner.

In addition

Linking Words

, a statistic in the UK depicts that renting businesses contribute 30% of all causes of disparity in a nation.

For

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this

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reason, it is crucial for government to take immediate action as a response. One of them is by providing spaces for local communities and promoting the area to society.

This

Linking Words

can be done by searching for a strategic location

Remove the comma

apply

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and transforming it into a mass shopping centre. After that, the government should promote

this

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new place by inviting many local

shops

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and stakeholders to work together.

For instance

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, in Semarang city in Indonesia, there is a road called Pecinan which consists of many old buildings, and it

then

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transformed into a whole new food centre

that is

Linking Words

famous for selling numerous traditional foods. In conclusion, the development of online

shops

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and large supermarkets

are

Correct subject-verb agreement

show examples

significantly causing social disparities , especially with local

shops

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, and the government should provide places for them and promote them.

Submitted by 000silr111 on Tue Nov 19 2024

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Coherence and Cohesion

Try to enhance the logical flow between paragraphs. Ensure that the reader can easily follow your argument by employing clear transitions.

Task Achievement

Provide more distinct and comprehensive ideas on how the government can help local shops thrive. Explore more solutions to provide a complete picture.

Coherence and Cohesion

The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, tying together the main ideas effectively.

Task Achievement

You have given a relevant and specific example about Semarang city in Indonesia, which effectively supports your argument.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

261 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

economies of scale
local employment opportunities
cultural diversity
community engagement
property prices
homogenization of the retail environment
social gathering points
unique and specialized products
local heritage preservation
online retailers

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It can be difficult for small local shops to compete with large supermarkets and with on-line shops. How does this affect local communities? What could be done to improve this situation?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

You recently visited a place that had a strong impact on you. Write a letter to a friend about the place. In your letter explain where the place was and how you got there describe what you saw offer to take your friend there

some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. why is this the case? do you think this is a positive or a negative developent?

Around the world, rural people are moving to cities and urban areas, so populations in the countryside are decreasing. Do you think that this is a positive or negative development?

"Some people believe that homework is unnecessary and should be banned from schools." To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people think most crimes are the result of circumstances like poverty and other social problems. Others believe that they are caused by people who are bad in nature. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.