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Band 6.5

The table below gives information about marriages in Australia from 1960 to 2000

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The table below gives information about marriages in Australia from 1960 to 2000
The table illustrates the marriages in Australia between 1960 and 2000 ON THE BASIS OF RELIGION, CIVIL AND
AGE
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.
OVERALL
Linking Words
,
IT IS CLEAR THAT
Linking Words
,
Punctuation problem
apply
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 THE HIGHEST NUMBER WAS SEEN IN
YAER
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THE YEAR
 2000,
WHERAS
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WHEREAS
 THE LOWEST
REPRESNETD
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WAS REPRESENTED
 IN 1960. THE CHANGES WERE
ALSO
Linking Words
 SEEN IN THE
AGE
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 GROUP IN 2000. LOOKING FIRST AT IN 1960, THE
RELOGION
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RELIGION
MARRIAGE
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 ACCOUNTED FOR 250000 AND 8000 FOR CIVIL,
WHILE
Linking Words
 BRODE AND
GROOM
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GROOM'S AGES
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AGE
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 WERE CONSIDERED BETWEEN 21 AND 14, RESPECTIVELY.
MOREOVER
Linking Words
, IN 1970, 28000 RECORED FOR CULTURAL AND 12000 FOR NORMAL MARRAIGE, BUT
AGE
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 FOR COUPLES ESTIMATED BETWEEN 23 and 25.
IN ADDITION
Linking Words
,
1980
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in 1980
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, 50000
MARRIAGE
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 WAS RECORDED IN RELIGION AND IT HOLDS HIGHEST NUMBERS OF
MARRIAGE
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, SO FOR THE
AGE
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, IT WAS 25 TO 27. TURNING TO THE REMAINING YEARS, IN 190, 32000 CASTE MARRIAGES RECORDED , AND 23000 IN COURT
MARRIAGE
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 AND THE
AGE
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 WAS BETWEEN 27 TO 30. IN 2000, RELIGION
MARRIAGE
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 WAS 340000 ,
ALONG WITH
Linking Words
 400000 IN CIVIL, AND IT HOLDS THE LARGEST NUMBER IN CIVIL
MARRIAGE
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.
ALSO
Linking Words
, IT HOLDS
GREATER
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A GREATER
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 NUMBER OF
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AGE
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PEOPLE OF A GREATER AGE
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Linking Words
THAT
Punctuation problem
, THAT
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 IS 30 FOR WOMEN AND 32 FOR MEN.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words age, marriage with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 4 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "numbers of" was used 2 times.
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