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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The charts below show the result of a survey of adult education. The first chart shows the reason why adults decide to study. The pie chart shows how people think the costs of adult education should be shared. Write a report for a university lecturer, describing the information shown below. »

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The charts give information about why
grown up
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grown-up
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 people decide to study and their opinion on how the costs of each course should be shared,
according to
Linking Words
 the survey participants.
Overall
Linking Words
,
it is clear that
Linking Words
 the interest in
subject
Correct article usage
a subject
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 and gaining qualifications are the main reasons
foe
Correct your spelling
for
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 adults’ decision to continue their education and most of the costs must be funded by individuals themselves. In
details
Fix the agreement mistake
detail
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, the first bar graph shows that 40% of people are lured to study because they
interested
Add a missing verb
are interested
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 in the program and 38% enrol to obtain the qualification. The following reasons which are helpful for current jobs, to improve prospects of promotion and enjoy learning were in a range between 22% and 20%.
While
Linking Words
, the least number of students, their purpose was to able to change jobs and to meet people (12% and 9% respectively).
According to
Linking Words
 the pie graph,
Correct article usage
an individual
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individual
Fix the agreement mistake
individuals
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 have to be the highest cost bearer for
his
Correct pronoun usage
their
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 own study (40%).
Next
Linking Words
, comes the employer
ate
Correct your spelling
at
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 35%, and after that the taxpayer with 25% of the fees.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "according to".
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 2 times.
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