The prevention of health problems is more important than treatment and medicine. Government funding should reflect this. To what extent do you agree?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
It is argued that whether the measures taken by government to preclude
health
Use synonyms
problems are more significant than cures and medicals. I completely disagree the statement given above, due to think that Some diseases
such
Linking Words
as genetics illnesses or epidemics can not be prevented. On the one hand, Taking some precautions is essential to overcome
health
Use synonyms
problems. These are can be to open free gyms in order to prevent different disease stemming from obesity, or to provide free
health
Use synonyms
services so as to protect people from diseases
arised
come into existence; take on form or shape
arose
arises
arise
from the usage of cigarettes and alcohol. In
this
Linking Words
way, disorders caused by overweight,
suchsuch
Suggestion
such such
as hypertension and diabetes or disorders caused by addictions
such
Linking Words
as
koah
fossil fuel consisting of carbonized vegetable matter deposited in the Carboniferous period
coal
and liver failure can be prevented. For instant
,
Accept space
,
after the institution called Yeşilay which is fighting with addictions had been established in Turkey
,
Accept space
,
It was observed that the proportion of people using tobacco and alcohols has decreased 50%.
This
Linking Words
example explains how much is important to take measures.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
Accept space
,
Although
Linking Words
taking precaution is significant
,
Accept space
,
cures and medicines play a pioneer role to handle with
health
Use synonyms
issues
.
Accept space
.
Because brain diseases
such
Linking Words
as autism or epilepsy an not be prevented by taking measures as they are genetically.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, since a virus and bacterias still exist in our lives
,
Accept space
,
obstructing to occur a pandemic is not possible yet.
Therefore
Linking Words
ınstead of taking measures government must prioritise cures or medicals so as to ensure a healthy society.
For example
Linking Words
,
Accept space
,
despite the measures to stop the spread of
coronavirus
Suggestion
epidemic took place
last
Linking Words
year, the Government could not save people from die
.
Accept space
.
However
Linking Words
, when scientists discovered the vaccine
,
Accept space
,
people survived. In conclusion, States must be careful about they are spending government fundings to cures and medicines more than taking precautions
.
Accept space
.
Because these are more effective to keep people healthy.
Submitted by Mustafa Mete on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: