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Writing Samples
Band 7

In many countries, unemployment among graduates is a serious issue. What are the problems, and what is the most effective solution do you think? What other measures could be taken?

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Introduction
In recent years, graduate unemployment has become a pressing concern around the world. The problem is a mismatch between
university
Use synonyms
 studies and labour market requirements. It can be mainly tackled by aligning the
university
Use synonyms
 curricula with labour market demands.
Body paragraph 1
The major issue is that many
university
Use synonyms
graduates
Use synonyms
 cannot find suitable jobs after completing their
university
Use synonyms
 studies.
Although
Linking Words
 they are well-equipped with theoretical knowledge and enthusiastic about their career, academic qualifications alone can not guarantee well-paid jobs and employment opportunities.
Moreover
Linking Words
, universities cannot provide students with practical
skills
Use synonyms
 , so they have to struggle with learning new
skills
Use synonyms
according to
Linking Words
 labour market demands. For these reasons,
graduates
Use synonyms
 are facing financial hardship and do not contribute to their community and country. It can lead to low economic growth and negatively affect
overall
Linking Words
 well-being at a national level.
Body paragraph 2
The most effective way to solve
this
Linking Words
 serious issue is to reform
university
Use synonyms
 curricula so that
graduates
Use synonyms
 can apply their knowledge and
skills
Use synonyms
 acquired during their
university
Use synonyms
 studies in the workplace. In order to do so, the government should allocate more resources for developing
university
Use synonyms
 curricula.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, it would be immensely helpful for
graduates
Use synonyms
 to gain some work experience before entering the workforce.
This
Linking Words
 can be achieved through internship programs and mentorship programs from well-established companies.
Additionally
Linking Words
, vocational training provided by local authorities can help young people to explore alternative career paths and acquire specialised
skills
Use synonyms
.
Conclusion
In a nutshell, graduate unemployment can negatively impact the growth and economy of countries around the world.
However
Linking Words
, it can be effectively solved by curriculum reform, the provision of apprenticeships and internships in big companies and the expansion of vocational training, with cooperation between governments,universities and local authorities.

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task response
You answer all parts of the question: the problems, the best answer, and other steps. To make your ideas stronger, add one clear real example. For example, say how a student of IT could work with a local company while studying.
task response
Your main answer is clear: change university courses to meet job needs. Explain more fully why this is better than the other steps, such as training or work programs.
task response
Some claims are too broad. Instead of saying universities cannot give practical skills, say that many courses give too little practical work. This is more fair and exact.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a clear order: introduction, problems, answers, and ending. Keep each body paragraph focused on one main job.
coherence and cohesion
Use linking words in a more natural way. You use 'Moreover', 'Furthermore', and 'Additionally' well, but do not start too many ideas in the same way. You can also show cause and result with 'so', 'because', and 'as a result'.
coherence and cohesion
Make the link between the problem paragraph and the answer paragraph clearer. For example: 'Because many graduates lack work skills, universities should work more closely with employers.'
task response
You give a clear main view and offer useful other steps, including work programs and job training.
task response
The effects of graduate joblessness are well explained, such as money problems and slower growth.
coherence and cohesion
The introduction states both the problem and your main answer clearly.
coherence and cohesion
The ending brings the key ideas together and gives a clear final message.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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