Some people think that certain prisoners should be made to do unpaid community work instead of being put behind bars. To what extent do you agree?

#people #prisoners #community #work #bars

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

Over the

last

Linking Words

few years, some people have argued that certain criminals should do unpaid

community

Use synonyms

services rather than being put in jails. In my opinion, I completely agree with

this

Linking Words

notion and in

this

Linking Words

essay

Add a comma

show examples

I will support my view with valid arguments and examples.

To begin

Linking Words

with, the main reason why I consider being jailed is not suitable for all culprits is that the sentence should depend on the type of

the

Remove the article

apply

show examples

crime.

For example

Linking Words

, petty criminal activities

such

Linking Words

as breaking traffic rules or reckless driving are not as serious as premeditated murder or kidnapping.

Consequently

Linking Words

, lawbreakers who commit minor offences should be made to do unpaid

community

Use synonyms

services which will benefit the whole society.

In contrast

Linking Words

, putting those who commit heinous crimes behind bars is crucial for the safety of other citizens.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, I believe that engaging in unpaid

community

Use synonyms

work, for those who commit mild misdeeds, has fruitful impacts on them.

This

Linking Words

is because they will be rehabilitated and learn how to contribute to their society.

Therefore

Linking Words

, it has been proven that criminals who are made to do

community

Use synonyms

work rarely recommit any crimes. Seldom does

this

Linking Words

occur if they are put in jails

Change the punctuation

show examples

Additionally

Linking Words

, during participating in unpaid

community

Use synonyms

services, they will have the opportunity to learn new skills which may help them earn their living

instead

Linking Words

of recommitting offences. In conclusion, according to the seriousness of the crime, I strongly believe that certain offenders should do unpaid

community

Use synonyms

work

instead

Linking Words

of being jailed. Indeed,

this

Linking Words

will have immense positive impacts on them and their behaviour.

Submitted by dentranda93 on Sun Jan 03 2021

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

261 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

6
band
some people believe that increasing violence in the media is the cause of increasing violence in our society, especially among children. others believe that children's peer groups and parental role models are a much more powerful influence on children's behavior.
Nowadays, people are able to gain knowledge through media thanks to globalization. The internet allows everyone, including children, to consume everything from everywhere easily. Unfortunately, the internet itself is a free space, which has the possibility to provide harmful content such as violence. Therefore, I strongly believe that parental methods and peer groups play a significant role in children's mindset and response towards violence issues. However, there are several things that we need to address regarding media management rules.
5
band
Some people say that what children watch influences their behaviour. Others believe the amount of time they spend on television influences their be haviour most. Discuss both vie ws and give your opinion.
There are opposite ideas about the negative effects of watching TV on children's behaviour. Some people believe that they can much more influenced by the content of TV programs, while others are of the opinion that the amount of time they have been spent is more significant. I completely agree with the former.
5
band
Write about the following topic. Some people decide to start their own business instead of working for a company or organisation. Do the advantages for people working for their own business outweigh the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
In this day and age, young generations tend to start up because they enjoy facing the difficulties of being entrepreneurs instead of working from night to five with a salary paid. From my point of view, the benefits of starting up outweigh the drawbacks.
<4
band
Some people think that it is more beneficial to take part in sports which are played in teams, like football. While other people think that taking part in individual sports is better, like tennis or swimming. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
in sports, playing in teams or individual more effective is still a controversal topic. It is difficult to determine whether both types of play has more significant impact on player's performence. It seems to me that althought playing in teams brings their more benefits at competitive, others players still play better by their own. This essay will shed light one both sides and my perspective.
<4
band
Some people work for the same organisation all their working life. Others think that it is better to work for different organisation. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Soma people work for the same organisation all their working life. Others think that it is better to work for all people. Some organisation is very good for somebody and again to opposite another humans.

Some people think that certain prisoners should be made to do unpaid community work instead of being put behind bars. To what extent do you agree?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

some people believe that increasing violence in the media is the cause of increasing violence in our society, especially among children. others believe that children's peer groups and parental role models are a much more powerful influence on children's behavior.

Some people say that what children watch influences their behaviour. Others believe the amount of time they spend on television influences their be haviour most. Discuss both vie ws and give your opinion.

Some people think that it is more beneficial to take part in sports which are played in teams, like football. While other people think that taking part in individual sports is better, like tennis or swimming. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Some people work for the same organisation all their working life. Others think that it is better to work for different organisation. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.