Some people think that certain prisoners should be made to do unpaid community work instead of being put behind bars. To what extent do you agree?

#people #prisoners #community #work #bars

Over the

last

few years, some people have argued that certain criminals should do unpaid

community

services rather than being put in jails. In my opinion, I completely agree with

this

notion and in

this

essay

Add a comma

show examples

I will support my view with valid arguments and examples.

To begin

with, the main reason why I consider being jailed is not suitable for all culprits is that the sentence should depend on the type of

the

Remove the article

apply

show examples

crime.

For example

, petty criminal activities

such

as breaking traffic rules or reckless driving are not as serious as premeditated murder or kidnapping.

Consequently

, lawbreakers who commit minor offences should be made to do unpaid

community

services which will benefit the whole society.

In contrast

, putting those who commit heinous crimes behind bars is crucial for the safety of other citizens.

Furthermore

, I believe that engaging in unpaid

community

work, for those who commit mild misdeeds, has fruitful impacts on them.

This

is because they will be rehabilitated and learn how to contribute to their society.

Therefore

, it has been proven that criminals who are made to do

community

work rarely recommit any crimes. Seldom does

this

occur if they are put in jails

Change the punctuation

show examples

Additionally

, during participating in unpaid

community

services, they will have the opportunity to learn new skills which may help them earn their living

instead

of recommitting offences. In conclusion, according to the seriousness of the crime, I strongly believe that certain offenders should do unpaid

community

work

instead

of being jailed. Indeed,

this

will have immense positive impacts on them and their behaviour.

Submitted by dentranda93 on Sun Jan 03 2021

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Do you want to check your IELTS writing?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

261 words

6.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 checks
Get all the feedback you need to keep improving your charts and letters.
Unlimited Task 2 checks
Practice and perfect your skills with essays.
Personalized suggestions
Know how to boost your score.
Detailed mistakes analysis
Get instant feedback. Spot every mistake.
Topic ideas generator
Get topic-specific ideas to enhance your writing.
Vocabulary helper
Get the right words for any topic.
Progress tracking
Track your writing improvements.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

7.5
band
Some people say that history has little or nothing to offer, while others say that study the past helps the present. discuss both the views and give your opinion.
Nowadays, technology plays a crucial role in human life. This is the reason why many individuals think that studying history is not necessary. While others disagree with the idea and say that learning about the past is significant to the present. In the following paragraph, both of these viewpoints will be discussed in detail before the conclusion is reached.
6
band
You and your family are planning to spend a weekend at a seaside hotel. Write a letter to the hotel, making the arrangements. In your letter tell them when you will be arriving and leaving explain what type of rooms you would like, and ask how much the weekend will cost ask about activities and places of interest near the hotel You should write at least 150 words.
Dear Sir, I am writing to make a reservation at your hotel over the course of the weekend.
6.5
band
Many people today do not feel safe either at home or when they are out. What are the causes? What are the solutions?
In the present day, with the advance of technology, many people find a variety of solutions to feel safer, however, one part of them still feel deprotected. The safety of citizens ought to be a field with more investment in order to build a better society. Because of this, it is essential to understand the possible causes to solve this problem with efficient solutions.
<4
band
Some people think parents should choose the university degree/major for their children. Others, however, say that children should be free to choose their own university degree/major. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
It is a matter of debate whether parents should opt for their children's university degree or major.While some people are in favour of giving parents a chance to choose,I believe future university students must follow their preferable way.
8
band
Children can learn effectively by watching television. Therefore they should be encouraged to watch television regularly at home and at school. To what extent do you agree or disagree with the statement?
In this tech-savvy era, technological devices could be used in order to educate the students. Likewise, some people believe that television is the best source to gain the knowledge so that children ought to learn from television at school and at home. I personally believe that the involvement of broadcast in the study is completely preposterous, despite some few educational channels which are knowledgeable.

Some people think that certain prisoners should be made to do unpaid community work instead of being put behind bars. To what extent do you agree?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Some people say that history has little or nothing to offer, while others say that study the past helps the present. discuss both the views and give your opinion.

Many people today do not feel safe either at home or when they are out. What are the causes? What are the solutions?

Some people think parents should choose the university degree/major for their children. Others, however, say that children should be free to choose their own university degree/major. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Children can learn effectively by watching television. Therefore they should be encouraged to watch television regularly at home and at school. To what extent do you agree or disagree with the statement?