The growing number of overweight people is putting a strain on the health care system. Some people think that the best way to deal with this problem is to introduce more physical education lessons in school curriculum. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #strain #health #care #system #education #lessons #school #curriculum

The escalating number of obese people is putting pressure on the

health

care system, to combat

this

issue, it is crucial to introduce more

sport

curriculum activities in

school

. I strongly agree that incorporating more physical education lessons in

school

is the long-term solution to control the overweight population.

Firstly

, children actively involved in exercise and

sports

school

will live a fit and healthy life. Being active in the

sport

as a child ensures they will be more

health

conscious later in life compared to those who were not.

Moreover

, schools ought to launch

sports

competitions frequently to encourage and incentivize students to partake in various

sport

curriculum activities because they can earn a prize or a medal if they win.

Thus

, it is a long-term solution to incorporate more

sport

and exercise in the

school

's curriculum as it will help in reducing the number of overweight population in the future.

Secondly

, parents of a sporty child are influenced by their children to be involved in various

sports

activities with them. Parents are not only influenced by their children, but they would

also

like to motivate, support, and bond with their sons and daughters by taking part in

sports

with them.

As a result

, both adults and juveniles will be living a healthy lifestyle which will eventually benefit public

health

. To conclude, schools introducing more physical education lessons to students is the long-term solution to control deteriorating public

health

in relation to weight.

Submitted by devina on Sun Jul 04 2021

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

244 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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The growing number of overweight people is putting a strain on the health care system. Some people think that the best way to deal with this problem is to introduce more physical education lessons in school curriculum. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Include an introduction and conclusion

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

In some countries, children start school at the age of four, while in other countries they start at seven. What is the ideal age for a child to begin formal education

The plans below show a public park when it first opened in 1920 and the same park today . Write at least 150 words.

It was observed that in some countries not enough students are choosing to study science subjects at universities . What are the causes ? What effects does this have on society

Foreign visitors should pay more than local visitors for cultural and historical attractions. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

In many countries around the world, life expectancy is increasing. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of this situation and give your own opinion.