Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#people #music #cultures #ages

Music

is believed to be one of the best ways to reunite

people

from different cultures, ages, and even religions. As far as I am concerned, I totally agree with

this

statement,

music

has the power to join

people

all over the

world

. The reasons for

this

magic will be discussed in

this

essay. Broadly speaking,

music

has an incredible mission

Change preposition

show examples

this

planet, it does not matter what kind of style one listens to, it may be blues, rock, country, rap or even classical

music

, it has the power of sending out messages, not only through its sounds produced by instruments but

also

the lyrics that are composed.

Music

is composited of several paramount elements

such

as promoting love and peace among humans, discussing political issues, for entertainment reasons as well, the intention is diversified.

Consequently

, festivals or concerts are promoted to bring

people

all over the

world

together for

this

purpose. The main objective, certainly, is to make a profit but even though what can be seen is that

people

travel from different places to participate in these events.

For instance

, one of the biggest festivals in the

world

is Rock in Rio,

Correct pronoun usage

which

show examples

takes place every two years in Rio de Janeiro - Brazil.

This

festival is held for two weeks and millions of

people

come from different countries to participate, several bands from different styles perform their songs. It is believed that not only the audience but

also

the city is benefited from these events. To conclude,

music

is able to make us aware of things that happen around the

world

, it

also

stirs our feelings, the message

that is

sent can make the

world

better, festivals and events that involve

music

reunite

people

and transform their lives.

Submitted by vivaldo.santana.ca on Thu Jul 29 2021

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

firstly
secondly
thirdly
in additional
moreover
also
for example
for instance
therefore
however
although
even though
despite

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

292 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.5

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

universal language
evoke
connect
diverse audiences
cultural exchange
generational gaps
shared experiences
unifying force

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Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Young people spend too much of their free time in shopping malls. This has a negative effect on young people and society. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Using computers and mobile phones in communication -> negative impact on reading and writing among young people, agree or disagree.

Many people think that to become a successful specialist it's better to choose a career early in life and never changer it later. To what extent do you agree with tis view. support your opinion with relevant examples.

Employers should give their staff at least four weeks of holiday a year to help employees get better at their jobs. To what extent do you agree or disagree?