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Band 6.5

With the improvements in today’s health care, society has to care for more and more elderly people. Do you feel that society will be able to cope with the increase in numbers of elderly people today and how can it be managed?

#improvements #today’s #health #care #society #people #numbers
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It has been suggested that topic for discussion, how we can increase the
number
Use synonyms
 of elder
people
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 and they should be defended. In my opinion, there are some ways for progress in their
number
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.
To begin
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 with, how can be elder
people
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 developed? Recently, I have read that from social media,
this
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 process doesn't depend
from
Change preposition
on
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 us because the health must be defended with various activities by themselves.
Such
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 as the cigarettes must be avoided, daily sport trains, daily sport must be done, getting positive energy, cheerful
instead
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 of nervous, anxiety and so on. Briefly, I believe strongly, these activities can increase the
number
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 of both the younger and the elder,
in
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addition
Add the comma(s)
,addition
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 managing rules depend from themselves again, these can't be managed by the others.
On the other hand
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, some protective measures ought to be enforced by the government to protect
people
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.
Firstly
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, the country has to find out negatives points or the elder's decreasing reasons.
In addition
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, as a matter of fact, without home
people
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 or orphan elder
people
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's
number
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 is developing so I consider that
such
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people
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 have to be cared or protect from the hazards by the government. As an example, the amount of
the
Correct article usage
apply
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nursing homes should be got progress, extra income must be paid and so on.
Hence
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, my personal view on
this
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 matter, their
number
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 progress
depends
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ondepends
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 the measures of both government and themselves. Taking everything into consideration, I am of the opinion that these measures and notions can assist the elder's
number
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 in the growth,
Linking Words
furthermore
Add a comma
,furthermore
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 these enactments are useful for managing
Submitted by aydin.quliyev2001 on

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