IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

Some parents buy their children a large number of toys to play with. What are the advantages and disadvantages for the child of having large number of toys?

#parents #children #toys #child
Nowadays, many parents buy a number of
toys
 for their children. The advantages for these are, it enhances creativity and imagination, and promote problem-solving skills. The disadvantages are including, behaviour change and
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
addiction .
This
 essay will discuss both arguments in depth. On the one hand, childhood is the primary age of development;
therefore
, engaging in
toys
 will enhance creativity and imagination. There are many
games
 where a kid requires logical thinking to play with their
toys
such
 as arrangements of blocks or making a building are one of its examples.
In addition
, they will learn problem-solving skills at a very initial age by involving themselves in those
games
, as a ,
inresult
Correct your spelling
result
in result
 their logical thinking will increases.
Thus
, playing with significant
toys
 in childhood is beneficial in both ways as it will spark the imagination;
moreover
, it gives happiness to kids. On the flip side, the disadvantages for excess engagement in a large number of
toys
 will lead to behaviour change, as an infant will spend their maximum time with their
games
 and create less social interaction with their peers and family. On the other side, they will become addicted to the
games
.
Finally
, if kids will have all the
toys
 they want, they will never understand the importance of one toy or it may lead to the rising of rigid behaviour among infants.
Therefore
, abundant
toys
 have an adverse effect on child development. To conclude,
Although
 every father or mother tries their best to accomplish every wish of their kid.
However
, excess of anything has adverse effects which are discussed in the essay above.
Submitted by niksmd1991 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
    What to do next:
    Look at other essays: