Gone are the days when children dreamed of becoming doctors and nurses – today’s children want to become YouTubers or vloggers. According to a survey of 1,000 children aged six to 17, more than three quarters of them say they’d consider a career in online videos. It is dangerous for kids to aspire to become a YouTube sensation. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Following the development of the Internet, numerous job opportunities for youngsters to engage the social media. In contemporary life, becoming a
Youtube
Correct your spelling
YouTube
show examples
sensation is a desirable dream for a huge number of people from six to seventeen years old, which is
concerned as
Verb problem
considered
show examples
a dangerous one for kids to take part in. In my perspective, I strongly agree with the statement view and
this
essay will focus on the main reasons and provide several relevant examples. Obviously,
vlogger
Fix the agreement mistake
vloggers
show examples
and
streamer
Fix the agreement mistake
streamers
show examples
are legitimate careers considering certain benefits, especially for teenagers and undergraduate students. First of all, working online as celebrities in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
virtual work might stimulate the participants to be more creative and productive. Essentially, viewers demand new content and amazing ideas from people who design the entertainment videos;
therefore
, the producers have to utilize their imaginations and learn new skills for other
Youtube
collaborators not only
satisfy
Fix the infinitive
to satisfy
show examples
their followers but
also
complete
Fix the infinitive
to complete
show examples
their projects before deadlines.
Secondly
, the youngsters possessing their own vlogs or websites would receive the great advantage of
recruitments
Fix the agreement mistake
recruitment
show examples
. In terms of job interviews, some
achievement
Fix the agreement mistake
achievements
show examples
related to the Internet
such
as having a million TikTok views or owning a million supprises on
Correct article usage
a Youtube
show examples
Youtube
Correct your spelling
YouTube
show examples
channel enable
to
Correct pronoun usage
one to
show examples
impress
company's
Correct article usage
the company's
show examples
employers
more
Change preposition
with more
show examples
than several academic certificates from other competitors.
On the other hand
, the negative side of famous is undeniable including unsustainable income and facing various scandals. Properly,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
social trend frequently changes mean those
Youtube
Correct your spelling
YouTube
show examples
cooperators might lose their
influences
Fix the agreement mistake
influence
show examples
if one day their jokes and their concept are outdated and nobody wants to their clips. In other words, the creators are unable to measure the value of their products and how long they can stick with
this
passion.
Finally
, almost
Youtubers
Correct determiner usage
all Youtubers
show examples
had
Wrong verb form
have
show examples
experiences with
criticals
Correct your spelling
critical
show examples
from the Internet without
age
Correct article usage
an age
show examples
limit;
thus
, they must carefully even in the smallest deeds which raise their mental
pressures
Fix the agreement mistake
pressure
show examples
. In conclusion, the desire of youngsters to own a
Youtube
Correct your spelling
YouTube
show examples
channel or vlog is significantly
convinced
Replace the word
convincing
show examples
which
provide
Correct subject-verb agreement
provides
show examples
motivation to work hard and greater job profiles.
However
, the negative impacts are considerable engaging unstable income and depression in real life.
Submitted by huyvuive2001 on

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task response
Task Response: The essay addresses the prompt by discussing the advantages and disadvantages of becoming a YouTube sensation. However, there is a need for more balanced consideration of both sides of the argument.
coherence and cohesion
Coherence and Cohesion: The essay has a logical structure, but there are issues with coherence and cohesion. The introduction and conclusion could be stronger, and the connection between ideas within paragraphs is not always clear. Additionally, transitions between ideas are lacking.

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