IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7.5

Some people think certain prisoners should be made to do unpaid community work instead of being put behind the bars. To what extent do you agree?

#people #prisoners #community #work #bars
There are numerous ways to punish criminals in different countries. Some say that all crimes should be sentenced with imprisonment of the criminal others argue that some convicts should be sentenced differently and do unpaid
community
 work. I tend to agree with the former statement.
To begin
 with, there are many prisoners who are young and forced to do some crimes like stealing or rubbery due to numerous socio-economic reasons. By teaching
this
 group some sort of
community
 task they can learn the needed skills to be able to task even after they served their sentence.
For instance
, there are many prison classes and programs for the young convicts to do some
community
 work which resulted in them continuing that job after they are released.
Additionally
, the idea of giving
community
jobs
 to convicted offenders is economically beneficial for the government. The current budget is dedicated to association
jobs
 are in the lowest amount and even
this
 amount can sometimes be a burden to some communities,
also
 the people who currently do these
jobs
 are being paid poorly and are forced to do it due to their economic state. By giving these
jobs
 to offenders, not only the budget regarding
this
 can be used for poor communities in the country but it
also
 helps the people to live in a more just environment as the citizens would not be forced to do the sorts of hard labour like
this
. to make it more tangible, one could refer to phrases in the manifesto for a just city which indicated that a just future is a place that no citizens are forced to do labour and these activities are done by machines or lawbreaker. overall, it seems that having some criminals and prisoners do free
community
 work can help the criminals as well as the government it could
also
 be helpful to achieve a just and safe future with fewer criminal activities.
Submitted by kianarastinew1 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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