Some people think that it is necessary to travel abroad to learn about other countries, while other people think that it is not necessary to travel abroad because all the information can be seen on TV and the Internet. Discuss both the views and give your opinion

#people #travel #countries #information #tv #internet

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It is thought by some public that it is vital to move to other lands to know regarding other

places

Use synonyms

, Whilst,

on the other

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hand

Add the comma(s)

,hand

show examples

some individuals feel that it is unnecessary to go foreign nations as total info can be watched on television and cyberspace.

This

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essay discusses both sides of the argument and

then

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in the end I will make my own perception about the topic.

To begin

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with, It is felt by many masses that journey to other lands is being required to collect data about them.

This

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is because it provides the opportunity to witness the surrounding by own eyes. Since interacting with people will allow understanding their culture and lifestyle

besides

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this

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it devotes the chances to visit various popular

places

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Furthermore

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, it devotes the chances to taste their foods, how are their road infrastructure, medical system, Government body laws etc. To cite an example, According to our country local tourist firm survey, 80% of masses are keener to visit external

places

Use synonyms

Secondly

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, Many people claim that

instead

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of roaming to other nations it is better to look at those facts on TV and website.

This

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is due to wasting of money and time.

Moreover

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, as most of the masses can not afford to bear the expenses of voyage and hoteling stay, Aside-from most of the tourist attraction

places

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are overpriced and exorbitant.

In addition

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, the visa process and travelling are being more time-consuming. To illustrate, according to a National Geographic survey, 60% of middle eastern are keener to watch documentaries of different countries rather than visiting those

places

Use synonyms

. In conclusion, both sides of the argument have their own pros and cons. On balance,

However

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, it seems that seeing outer nations is better because it gives more close observation of their people, environment, living ways and many more.

Submitted by engrizazsaeed on Thu Feb 10 2022

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11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

302 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

immersive
interactions
virtual means
cultural nuances
language acquisition
problem-solving
adaptability
sustainability
virtual tours
documentaries
sophisticated
realistic representations
comprehensive understanding
financial status
carbon footprint
digital resources

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