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Writing Samples
Band 6

Some people think that sport is very important for society. Others, however, argue that it is nothing more than a leisure activity. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

#people #sport #society #leisure #activity
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Some
people
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harbor
Change the spelling
harbour
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 a belief that
sport
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 plays an indispensable role in contemporary
society
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, whereas others hold an
opposite
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opposing
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 viewpoint that
leisure
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activities
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is
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are
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 more significant than
sport
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. In my opinion, sports and
leisure
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activities
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 are equivalent. Admittedly, there are a number of reasons why some
people
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 argue that
sport
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 is very vital for
society
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. The main reason for believing
this
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 is that regular exercises can help
people
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 not only keep
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
fit but
also
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 prevent
from
Change preposition
apply
show examples
diseases. Through doing exercises
people
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 can increase their metabolism and digest the fatty and
high-calories
Correct your spelling
high-calorie
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 consumptions. In a long term, it can efficiently avoid
people
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 suffering from obesity, cardiovascular disease and so on.
In addition
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,
sport
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 can unite players. Players develop their cooperation
skill
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skills
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 and communication
skill
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skills
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 when they are in
a
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apply
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teamwork.
In other words
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,
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sport
Add an article
the sport
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 has a huge impact on
people
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 both in their health and their abilities. At the other end of the spectrum,
such
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 as a major role
does
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do
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leisure
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activities
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, drawing and reading, play in
society
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. Drawing can aid
people
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enrich
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to enrich
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 their imagination.
Also
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,
people
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 can express their
emotion
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emotions
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 via drawing,
in particular
Linking Words
 those who have
Add an article
a problem
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problem
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problems
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 in expressing
or
Correct pronoun usage
themselves or
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too
Add a missing verb
are too
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 shy to talk with others.
Similarly
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,
people
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 improve their individual thinking and boost their
creativities
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creativity
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 by reading books. In
this
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 way, individuals improve their own capabilities and express
the
Change the word
their
show examples
 emotion in order to release pressure. In conclusion, despite the fact that
sport
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 is an extremely crucial part of the daily basis,
leisure
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activities
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also
Linking Words
 provide a substantial positive effect on individuals. From my perspective,
sport
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 and
leisure
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activities
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 have an equally essential role to play in
society
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,
people
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 can not live without them.
Submitted by sam658769 on

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Physical activity
  • Sedentary lifestyle
  • Chronic diseases
  • Teamwork
  • Cultural divides
  • Revenue generator
  • Infrastructure
  • Patriotism
  • Role models
  • Commercialization
  • Recreation
  • Stress-relief
  • Elite sports
  • Injury risks
  • Doping scandals
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