Some people believe that success in life comes from hard work and determination, while others think that there are more important factors such as money and appearance. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Based on some notions, prosperity is just the offspring of diligence,whereas the opponents believe that wealth and
appearance
are more critical in bestowing success to individuals.
However
,in my point of view,hardworking would provide the infrastructure of subsequent improvements,while financial issues can exacerbate the process if being utilised properly.Both sides are uttered here. One of the most highlighted benefits of being diligent has to do with enhancing the chance of grasping the prepared job vacancies.Not only collected experiences but the vocational connections that used to be made with other experts
also
can alter the result for the better.To enlighten,the majority of employers are probing for people,who have adequate information and practical experiences in their subjects.Which completely is transparent in the requirement sectors of advertised vocations.
Furthermore
,self-confidence is the positive footprint that would alter the future of determined folks,due to the psychologists' research.
Therefore
,workers would attain the capability of being a pioneer in their field,when both their confidence and
similarly
their awareness of shortcomings be mingled together.
For instance
,based on their collected abilities,it is feasible for them to invent and introduce a new device to the globe to tackle some drawbacks,
such
as the introduction of the internet.
On the other hand
,the flexibility that both wealth and
appearance
bring for people cannot be ignored.As a vivid case,the planet is filled with investors that have access to lucrative sources of revenues,based on their contribution in financial affairs,namely,providing the economic requirements for making a movie and
subsequently
, increasing their money by selling them.
In other words
,flourishing in terms of income.
Moreover
,whether or not humans would be judged by their
appearance
in the
first
interaction.
for example
,either performer that would be opted based on their face and their body shape or others' personality that will be forecasted via their
appearance
,which can convert the future of them if are accepted by others or not. To recapitulate,some are of the mind that the strongest radix behind humans' prosperity regarding their commitment to their ambitions,while others consider money and
appearance
as the main player.To me,wealth and
appearance
can be beneficial if are integrated with hardworking.
Submitted by drpnima on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Ultimate Speaking practice for IELTS

Practice speaking step by step, answer real-life questions, and build your confidence. Start your free trial and improve your speaking skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • perseverance
  • discipline
  • resilience
  • effort
  • tenacity
  • external factors
  • financial resources
  • favorable appearance
  • perceptions
  • advantages
  • intrinsic
  • extrinsic
  • sustainable
  • facilitating
  • undeniable
What to do next:
Look at other essays:

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!