It is suggested that all the young adults should undertake a period of unpaid work helping people in the community. Does it bring more benefits or drawbacks to the community and the young people?

Volunteering has always been considered a virtue
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
individuals and society.
Although
there is an argument that
this
should be compulsory for all young
people
, in my opinion,
this
compulsion would bring more harm
instead
of advantages. There are two main benefits of compelling young
people
to do unpaid
work
.
Firstly
, the basic needs of indigents
such
as food and housework may be fulfilled. Many
people
who are in need cannot afford the food materials and starve, there is
also
a population who are unable to do housework because of disability or ageing.
Secondly
, helping others could boost the virtues of responsibility and compassion. There is a chance that seeing these
people
results in more understanding and broadening youth's horizons that the world is full of
the
Correct article usage
apply
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population in an
unfavorable
Change the spelling
unfavourable
show examples
situation. They may
do
Unnecessary verb
apply
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not know how bad the situation can be and just live for themselves if they do not see and feel these
people
in person.
On the other hand
, I believe
this
coercion would have more downsides. One of these would be a lack of motivation. If youngsters have a say
to help
Change preposition
in helping
show examples
others as a volunteer, more numbers of them will become one.
This
group may not prefer to obey and do something compulsory but in the case of free will, they are happy to help. Another disadvantage could be the busy job schedule.
Youth
Fix the agreement mistake
Youths
show examples
need to
work
full-time to have a prosperous future and be able to raise a family,
therefore
, they are likely to not have enough time for unpaid
work
and if they are forced to do
, they
Rephrase
so, they
show examples
will face health problems
such
as chronic fatigue.
Moreover
,
this
compulsion may give a sense of belittlement to the
people
in the community. No one accepts help from others if they are not willing to do that. In conclusion, compelling youngsters to do unpaid
work
in the community would have more potential
harms
Fix the agreement mistake
harm
show examples
than possible benefits. In my view, encouraging them to do volunteering would be more efficient.
Submitted by Sarah_nazari on

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task response
Provide more specific examples of the potential harms of compelling young people to do unpaid work
coherence cohesion
Use transition words and phrases to improve the flow between ideas and paragraphs

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • skill development
  • soft skills
  • teamwork
  • communication
  • leadership
  • social responsibility
  • community engagement
  • empathy
  • civic duty
  • networking opportunities
  • volunteering
  • personal growth
  • confidence
  • financial compensation
  • economic drawbacks
  • exploitation
  • free labor
  • fair exchange
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