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Band 6.5

In some cultures,children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvages of giving children this message?

In
this
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 competitive world, there are many ways to reach success. It is widely witnessed that in certain communities, elders teach their younger generation that hard
work
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 is the only key to success in life.
This
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 essay will discuss the pros and the cons of
this
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 view
such
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 as boosting confidence, inculcating a habit of hard
work
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 into young minds, and sometimes can make them ignore smart
work
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 and failure management.
First
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 of all, encouraging children to try hard to achieve goals can improve their confidence greatly because it helps them to focus on the goals to be reached. so, the taste of success would be fruitful.
In addition
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, a habit of hard
work
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 is inculcated into young minds.
This
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 becomes a key to avoiding shortcuts to gain the needs which could be dangerous. It makes them learn the difference between earning and stealing.
For instance
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, students who are trained in mental maths are considered more intelligent than students who rely on calculators.
In contrast
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 to that, sometimes children will be stuck working hard
instead
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 of working smart. motivating children can sometimes make the ignore the importance of smart
work
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 because it saves them a lot of time.
For example
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, the usage of computers to organize data can save them a good amount of time.
Also
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, youth can be frustrated when their hard
work
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 fails to yield desired results so, the whole process of teaching hard
work
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 becomes a waste when they are not taught about the management of failures. In conclusion, after analyzing the view, there are advantages to teaching kids about working hard like boosting their confidence, imbibing a good habit. and
also
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, it is disadvantageous when it is not taught along with the requirement of smartness in
work
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 and management of failures.

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • motivation
  • self-esteem
  • confidence
  • perseverance
  • growth mindset
  • unrealistic expectations
  • anxiety
  • resilience
  • mental health
  • external factors
  • socio-economic conditions
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