Some people think it is more beneficial to take part in sports which are played in teams, like football, while other people think that taking part in individual sports is better like tennis and swimming. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Some say that it is more beneficial while
playing
Wrong verb form
play
show examples
sports
like cricket,
football
Correct word choice
and football
show examples
in teams. While others would argue that it is good to take part in solo
sports
like tennis and swimming. I believe individual
sports
brings
Change the verb form
bring
show examples
more
Change the word
apply
show examples
better career growth personally to reach
at
Remove the preposition
apply
show examples
a champion level. On the one hand, the spirit of playing together
keep
Correct subject-verb agreement
keeps
show examples
the
team
co-operation to achieve their desired goals. The need for collaborative thinking makes every individual
to
Change the verb form
apply
show examples
put their effort at the required level through which the
team
relationship and trust can be in made better position to present themselves
with
Change preposition
to
show examples
competitors.
Moreover
, innovative ideas will gain the essence of togetherness in the
long lasting
Add a hyphen
long-lasting
show examples
endeavours effectively and
makes
Change the verb form
make
show examples
the
team
to
Change the verb form
apply
show examples
work efficiently.
For instance
, advice given by the
team
captain
at
Change preposition
in
show examples
sports
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
equally respected by
team
individuals for enhancing
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
better results with positive commitment.
On the other hand
, every individual possesses a dream that has to be fulfilled with certain growth in their career. The requirement of hard work determines that an individual
had
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
has to perform well in order to gain the accepted level of accomplishment from the audience.
As a result
, the devotion of time gives the performer to boost more energy in achieving the status of records for future generations to look
Change preposition
at as
show examples
as
Replace the word
like
show examples
a model of success.
For example
, tennis player Stephy Graph became popular among the
teenagers
Replace the word
teenage
show examples
girls in Canada for her thrice accomplishment
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
U.S open tennis from 2010 to 2013. To conclude, individuals can receive more benefits while playing in teams which
enhance
Correct subject-verb agreement
enhances
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
team
cooperation. I believe the essential requirement of each individual is to have
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
personal growth in
career
Correct pronoun usage
their career
his career
her career
show examples
for
better
Add an article
the better
a better
show examples
embrace of medals for future generations to think.
Submitted by bon.joseph on

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • cooperation
  • team spirit
  • sense of belonging
  • community
  • leadership
  • trust
  • collective responsibility
  • dependency
  • self-reliance
  • self-discipline
  • goal setting
  • tailored development
  • flexibility
  • social support
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