IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Schools are no longer necessary because children can get so much information available through the Internet and they can study just as well at home. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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Children
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 get to learn a lot of knowledge at home with the help of the
internet
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 rather than going to
school
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. I agree that it is important for
children
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 to know the importance of discipline, moral values and socializing which can be inculcated by going to
school
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.
However
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, the
internet
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 is a big world and there is a huge scope for gaining knowledge. In many places, schools are referred to as temples. The main reason for the concept of schools is that they can inculcate discipline in the child from a very young age
such
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 as being punctual and wearing a proper uniform which brings a sense of equality to
students
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. Schools not only just teach the subjects, but
also
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 have physical activities included in their curriculum. Physical activity plays a very key role and is required to be a part of their life from a very young age.
Children
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 get to learn moral and ethical values which helps the student to socialize with his
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school mates
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schoolmates
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 and staff.
On the contrary
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, there are many
children
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 who cannot afford education due to their bad financial conditions but have
an
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the
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 interest to gain knowledge and many
students
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 don't have access to a proper education system.
such
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students
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 can make very good use of the
internet
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 and use it as a learning tool. There are many online platforms that are available for
students
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 for free to improve their skillset. So if one can afford education financially, It is important to go to
school
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 and use the
internet
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 as an additional medium of learning.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • social development
  • fostering communication
  • personalized guidance
  • immediate feedback
  • replicated
  • structured environments
  • discipline
  • time management skills
  • extracurricular activities
  • nurture talents
  • inculcate
  • sense of community
  • shared learning experiences
  • equal access
  • learning opportunities
What to do next:
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