Successful sports professionals can earn a great deal more money than people in other important professions. Some people think this is fully justified while others think this is unfair. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Successful
sports
professionals can gain a have high paying salaries than individuals in other vital careers.some
people
think
this
is fully justified while others
people
think it is unfair.
accordingly
a couple of reasons will be explored in
this
essay. I am of the opinion that some
people
think It is unfair to reason income
such
popular and professional sportsman or women’s is high and
consequently
is not necessary for
sports
individual and can
this
deal
money
in other sectors society to spend until the sport
that is
too much.by way of illustration for building schools,charity,help to cancer centres and other poor
people
and low income .It is argued that
people
think that even many consistence years of effort and hard-working and saving
money
again can not have
for example
spacious flat or big house,posh SUV,luxury travel ,have
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
such
leisure amenities and other stuff like
this
.
On the other hand
,have number low
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
population
Correct article usage
the population
show examples
community is composed of celebrities and
sports
professionals maybe one
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
of the total.Experts believe that
this
individual with
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
a
money making
Add a hyphen
money-making
show examples
job ,famous and popular is few I agree with
this
subject that
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
a great deal more
money
.
Additionally
, Ali Dae is
acceptable
Correct article usage
an acceptable
show examples
and admirable
sports
Correct your spelling
sportsman
show examples
man
and I praised him for his prodigious personality because he is highly serious in his work and one of the best
personality
Fix the agreement mistake
personalities
show examples
in our country
and
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
I am proud of him for having
such
sports
man
.when he was very young had persistent
endeavors
Change the spelling
endeavours
show examples
in football and gaining named Mr goal in football. Ali Dae is famous
home
Change preposition
at home
show examples
and abroad and having worthy a great deal and even now has more activities in education young
sports
Correct your spelling
sportsman
show examples
man
and
furthermore
is
benevolent
Add an article
the benevolent
a benevolent
show examples
man
.I
am take
Change the verb form
am taking
show examples
the view that
this
is not unfair because is
success
Replace the word
successful
show examples
doctors in
my
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
our community with high
well paid
Add a hyphen
well-paid
show examples
job that not famous and
people
not aware
about
Change preposition
of
show examples
business and lifestyle. In conclusion, the individual
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
internationally recognized if had great income has
persistence
Replace the word
persistent
show examples
attempts until received to
such
position
Correct article usage
a position
show examples
.
Submitted by omid.afsharpour on

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  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • financial remuneration
  • exceptional
  • merit
  • talent
  • demand
  • entertainment value
  • career span
  • physical demands
  • justified
  • unfair
  • criticism
  • income inequality
  • societal priorities
  • sportsmanship
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