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Writing Samples
Band 6

In many countries, the crime level is increasing, and crimes are becoming more violent. What is the reason and what can be done about it?

#countries #crime #level #crimes #reason
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The
crime
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rate
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 is more and more increasing in many
countries
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, and
crimes
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 are becoming more and more violent. There are many factors that contribute to
this
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. In
this
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 essay, I will discuss what is the reason and what can be done about it.
Firstly
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, if we look at the
countries
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 with the highest
crime
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rate
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, more or less we can see similar factors
such
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 as high levels of poverty, drugs, and economic recession.
In particular
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, one popular research made quite clear that children who don't drop out and complete school are less likely to commit
crimes
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.
On the contrary
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, if many families are having financial difficulties, it is likely that their children will drop out and incomplete their studies.
As a result
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, there will be more
crimes
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.
Secondly
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, drugs are related to
crime
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 in multiple ways. Many offenders often commit offences to support their
drug
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 habit. Individuals who participate in
drug
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 trafficking are prone to use violence too. Because of that, there are 20
countries
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 with the harshest
drug
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 laws in the world. Among them, the
countries
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 like Singapore and Malaysia have capital punishment for those who sell drugs. They have a zero-tolerance policy for
drug
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crimes
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. All in all, in today's world, the
crime
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rate
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 is increasing and
crimes
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 are becoming more violent. In order to tackle the above, the governments should work to reduce the poverty, law enforcement officers must comply with their laws, introduce harsh laws for
drug
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-related
crimes
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, and
last
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 but not least the government should give children free education. I am more convinced that if we can tackle all of these, the
crime
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rate
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 should have reduced.
Submitted by kyawtlearning on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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