some feels that individuals should try assimilate compeletly to the country where they live while others feel it is more important to preserve their native culture. Discuss both sides and give you opinion.

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A myriad society believes people have to take efforts in order to have total assimilation into the nation they reside in.

Although

Linking Words

, others consider preserving one's national identity more vital. From my perspective, protecting culture is more significant. There are several factors why the public should not forget about their origin.

Initially

Linking Words

, a significant proportion of the population has the opinion to value the history of their country, and they justify that having loyalty to past incidents is valuable.

In addition

Linking Words

, culture defines an individual's community, which by protecting and widespread it, might become global. To illustrate

this

Linking Words

, Nowrouz is becoming worldwide with the help of Persians, who have immigrated to various countries, and many celebrate it annually and spend a joyful time with their loved ones. Following

this

Linking Words

, people could exchange their cultural characteristics to get more familiar with different societies which exist in the world.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, others agree that they have to forget about their past and get assimilated into the country they opt to habit. They might have a sense of shame and be less confident about their true identity.

Secondly

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, they are not interested in any historical events or places and they consider there is no reason why they should be proud of these.

Moreover

Linking Words

, they are afraid of being judged by a racist community after migration and

this

Linking Words

is why they seek to be accepted as soon as possible in the new nation. To sum up,

although

Linking Words

many believe it is essential to be protective of their own nationalities, others think it is not vital and they even might be bullied because of that, which I totally agree with the

first

Linking Words

notion.

Submitted by ghazalegholamnia on Sun Oct 30 2022

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

280 words

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some feels that individuals should try assimilate compeletly to the country where they live while others feel it is more important to preserve their native culture. Discuss both sides and give you opinion.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Some people think that the best way to reduce the amount of waste produced by society is to impose strict regulations on industries, while others believe that individuals should take responsibility for their own actions. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people are born to become leaders, others believe leadership can be learned. Discuss both views and give your own opinion

Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different culture and ages together. To what extent do you agree or dis agree with this.

Do you think it is important to protect animals? What can be done to deal with this problem?

Some experts believe that it is better for children to begin learning a foregin language at primary school rather than secondary school. Do the advanantages of this outweight the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include some relevant examples.