It is important or people to take risks, in both professional and personal lives. Do you think advantages of taking risks outweigh the disadvantages?

#people #risks #lives

Taking

risks

should be an inevitable segment of both personal and professional

life

Nevertheless

, there are merits of taking

risks

in a career than in private

life

. According to my perspective, there are more demerits than merits, which along with the conclusion at the end, would be captivated the forthcoming paragraphs. The

risks

assist the people to earn profits when these are taken at a professional level during the venture setup phase after getting a loan of a catastrophic amount;

therefore

, the

risks

have the potential to change one's

life

. A businessman, to cite an example, has taken a loan from the bank crores to establish a business;

this

risk

taken by him would lead him to chase the pavement for success if he would work strategically and enthusiastically.

Nevertheless

, sometimes

risks

may spoil a person's entire

life

, particularly when he endeavours to become an affluent personality by adopting the hands of the shortcut.

For example

, an individual who is indulged in gambling would take the

risk

to earn money by playing casino.

Consequently

this

sort of

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

risk

would provoke him to make his financial situation tight even if he could not able to feed his family.

Secondly

, in the stock market where uncertainty always remains present, a

risk

endured by an individual would cause him to face financial loss, which may stimulate him to be a bundle of nerves. In conclusion,

although

risks

make folks' lives better, their adverse consequences cannot be neglected.

Thus

, people should bear all factors in mind before taking in order to make their personal and professional

life

like a bed of roses.

Submitted by jatinderpanaich328 on Thu Nov 03 2022

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Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

269 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.5

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

Opportunities
Growth
Innovation
Challenges
Self-discovery
Resilience
Uncertainty
Consequences
Calculated risks
Stagnation
Regret
Comfort zone
Entrepreneurship
Adventurous spirit
Thriving
Failure
Mitigate
Reap the rewards

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It is important or people to take risks, in both professional and personal lives. Do you think advantages of taking risks outweigh the disadvantages?

Fully explain your ideas

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