Some people think it is no longer necessary for children to go to school because they can do all their learning online. Others believe learning in schools is essential. Discuss both views and give your opinion

#people #children #school #schools

Online

education

is becoming increasingly popular these days. Many people claim that it is not essential for a

child

to undergo formal

education

by going to

school

, as they believe that they can do the schooling online. Whilst, a few believe that schooling is necessary. Let us discuss both the views in coming passages.

However

, I believe that going to

school

is important because it allows overall development for a

child

. To commence with, institutional

education

plays quite an important role in the

child

's overall development.

Although

learning can be done online, there are certain aspects which cannot be taught.

In other words

, by going to

school

child

can develop punctuality, discipline and develop social skills.Take

for

Add the comma(s)

,for

show examples

instance, a study conducted in

this

area that proved children who go to

school

are more organised and have great communication skills in comparison to kids who do not.

Hence

schooling plays a pivotal role and paves the way for their future.

Furthermore

, they can involve in sports, and participate in interschool competitions,

this

further

improves both the physical and mental well-being of the

child

. As stated by a few people, going to

school

is not required as online

education

is accessible to almost everyone. It might seem to them that

child

Fix the agreement mistake

children

show examples

can study in their own comfort without going to

school

. Take

for

Add the comma(s)

,for

show examples

instance, there is nothing

that is

available over the internet, we can find teachers who can train the pupils virtually and parents can have close monitoring of their

child

Fix the agreement mistake

children

show examples

For example

, in recent times, with the advent of covid 19, almost every aspect of

education

was virtual and

this

might have generated the thought of online

education

among the people who suggest that there is no necessity of going to traditional schools anymore. To sum up, putting forward both views, I opine that formal schooling is essential for the development of an individual in all aspects.

However

, not to undermine the advantages of online schooling, I strongly believe that there should be strong educational values instilled in students.

Submitted by minireddy97 on Sun Jan 01 2023

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10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

339 words

7.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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